#1
okay here it is...this is one of my first and i can't get better if you guys don't crit...do PLEASE CRIT


don't try and fake it if you know it's not real-G,D,C,A
cause no amout of "sorrys" gonna change how i feel-G,D,C,A
take what you came with and get on your way-G,D,C,A
i don't have time for anything, not today-G,D,C,A

bridge
wasting seconds that i can't get back-Em,G,Am,C
so don't come in here and tell me to relax-Em,C,G,D
(cause)

nothing's gonna change, nothings gonna change who you are-G,D,C,A
it used to be fine till you took it too far-G,D,C,A
too many endless nights by the phone-G,D,C,A
while you had your fun i was home all alone-G,D,C,A
(so)

don't try and fake it if you know it's not real-G,D,C,A
cause no amount of "sorry's" gonna change how i feel-G,D,C,A
take what you came with and get on your way-G,D,C,A
i don't have time for anything not today (x2)-G,D,C,A
If every simple song i wrote
would take your breath away
i'd write it all
Last edited by kaihla at Mar 24, 2007,
#2
i reallylike it. the only thing is in the third stanza the 3rd and 4th line down both end in all alone, and with the rest of your song, it just doesnt seem to wrok for me. idk it might just be me but i'd try to find another ending for the 4th line. good job though. could you crit "vibe"? thanks good job
#3
oh that line is supposed to be by the phone that's ill change it!
If every simple song i wrote
would take your breath away
i'd write it all