North East's Joke Club
Join date: Jan 2006
128 IQ
Heres another one that i got. Not quite finished tho but say what you think on what i have.
Sunderland AFC
Registered User
Join date: Oct 2006
744 IQ
I didn't particularly like that song. I especially didn't like the chorus part that started at bar 40. You need to change some notes to make it all in one key. Some notes on the lead sound good only in one measure of that whole riff, so maybe change some notes up or down a few frets only in some bars to make it go better with the rythm. It was a nice try and you shouldn't give up on it. Keep working on it. Rock on.

crit mine?
Registered User
Join date: Jan 2006
6,792 IQ
Yeah, i agree.
The intro, i see you're idea, and it was cool, but the like of bar 3, 7 and so on do sound a bit out of place. That being said it does sound better when you transpose those bars mentioned down an octave, makes it fit in more

The riff starting at bar 25, oh my. Been done to death to be honest, by a lot of glam metal bands back in the 80's.
40-41 was cool, think you overused it. It was simple, effective, but maybe more variations rather than just repeating them straight?

It's lacking drive in the bass/drum department, i take it you're not a drummer then?
It would sound great even if a simple rock beat was entered.