leo_p8
Registered User
Join date: Jun 2003
175 IQ
#1
This is a strange song... the vocal line does most of the heavy lifting in the transition department... so this feels rather choppy. I included a GP5 MP3 audio export for the hell of it this time...

Tell me what you think.

http://www.sendspace.com/file/5rsz8p

EDIT: Three complaints in three minutes... wow! It's ok... I just wanted to try something different.
Attachments:
DM-ForZion.zip
Last edited by leo_p8 at Jun 4, 2007,
ch715dallat
BTBAM=Godly
Join date: Jun 2006
3,466 IQ
#2
man thats annoying why dont you just attach it to the thread like everyone else, your probably losing out on a lot of crits

anyways i'd love to crit it but the page keeps timing out so just attach it to the thread and ill crit it
vIsIbleNoIsE
The Asian-Viking Paradox
Join date: Feb 2006
1,543 IQ
#3
yea, and when it does work, it downloads very slowly
Quote by archerygenious
Jesus Christ since when is the Pit a ****ing courtroom...

Like melodic, black, death, symphonic, and/or avant-garde metal? Want to collaborate? Message me!
vIsIbleNoIsE
The Asian-Viking Paradox
Join date: Feb 2006
1,543 IQ
#5
ok it worked.

riff 3 i like

the solo is weird - but if that's how typical death metal solos go, i dunno
Quote by archerygenious
Jesus Christ since when is the Pit a ****ing courtroom...

Like melodic, black, death, symphonic, and/or avant-garde metal? Want to collaborate? Message me!
gonzaw
UG's Secret Agent
Join date: Mar 2007
6,087 IQ
#6
I think you like Germany ......just kidding

I think that if the riff wasn't PM it would sound better...well, thats my opinion.
I like your use of drums....on the other hand the bass may need a different basline...one that could harmonice all the piece perfectly (anyway...its deathmetal...bass doesn't matter at all...does it ).

I liked your time signature change...but at times it felt kind of weird....you know...like when you expect something to continue with the rythm of the other measures but instead it takes longer time and your notion of time in the piece kind of loses (if you didn't understand a thing I said don't worry...its not that important either )

Wow...the solo is kind of whacko isnt it........and the transition to the next riff too...wow..........................................wow...

Talking about that riff....that was weird too....eh.....I don't know what to say
Riff 6 was the best of all (well...was kind of a solo)....I really liked it and seemed like a rest from the other weirdness of the riffs

Anyway....for deathmetal it seems nice....but I think it would make it a lot better if it had a little more melody to it (I don't know if that is allowed in death metal ? )
ch715dallat
BTBAM=Godly
Join date: Jun 2006
3,466 IQ
#7
woah that was weird why does my songs not make that sound for guitar it sounds like theres a keyboard playing in the background but there isnt

anyhoo, br00tal riffs im writing something like this myself at the moment, i love the first riff but it all pales in comparison to the epic solo very nice. and the riff after the solo is just heavy as ****. riff 2 is great but thats the one that has the weird sound as tho its electric like a keyboard or something

Riff 5 is another perfect one and riff6, i love the lead at the slow down. the guitars are just droning which is cool but what tuning are these things in A standard? oh i see its c

good stuff man



Edit: the point Gonzaw made about thinking the riff willcontinue but doesnt is what i felt with the first riff, it just feels like it gets cut off and repeated again when there should be more to it i dunno
leo_p8
Registered User
Join date: Jun 2003
175 IQ
#8
Like I said in my first post, the vocal line really does all the work in the "flow" department. It carries the melody durring the last section (riff 6) and carries the rhythm durring the entire first section of the song (before riff 5)... I'm not sure how to put that in GP... but I'll try this weekend... any ideas as to HOW to do it would be apretiated. This is DM, so it's not like I can just stick a synth over it... how do you write screaming/growling lyrics into a song in GP?
onebetter
User Registered
Join date: Aug 2006
1,268 IQ
#9
Excellent piece. Death metal is quickly becoming one of my favorite genres (I still have a soft spot for thrash, though) and this is a prime example why. I especially liked how you didn't just program a blast beat to play over and over on the drums. The guitar and bass work fit together very well, and I didn't think it sounded screwy at all, but that might have something to do with the fat that I'm a huge prog fan. The solo was top notch and all the riffs were very heavy yet they had enough melody in them to keep it interesting. Very well done. Crit my new one? Another slayer rip off, but an origional nonetheless. the curse
ctb
Join date: Apr 2004
1,449 IQ
#10
That was great, as well as all of your other songs on here, I feel i'm typing the same comment. My favourite bit was after the solo, it took me by suprise.