this is a song i'm working on for a friend of mine, she's a foreign exchange student from germany and i wanted to write her a song before she leaves so please give me some criticism on what i have so far

there's no bass in it yet cuz i have to borrow my friend's bass to do it and the drums were made using Acoustica Beatcraft

here's the link:

I... hope that's what she listens to... lol... not what I was expecting.

Decent tune, I'd clean up the intro a little bit, but otherwise not too bad. I realize it's just a work in progress, so well done, on the right track I'd say.
from.lashes.to.ashes || from.lust.to.dust
yeah, it's what she listens to, i wouldn't have done it if it wasn't

i'm gonna clean up the intro last cuz it was a pain, it's not hard to play but i still kept messing up....it took me around 8 tries to get it down and sound decent

when i'm finished with the entire thing i'll be posting it here for everyone but i'd like thoughts from more people on what i have