#1
i posted this song a long while back and never got any crit. :p.


Verse 1

It's the end
and i know this only by your tears.
And i sit and i wait
this is the top of all my fears.
What's the point
of going on with this life?
Some people stay,
some people settle it with a knife.

But as the moment comes closer
in which i resist
then, only
I start to insist
that when I stop thinking
it'll all be clear,
that there's not much time
for the rest of us here.

Chorus:
It's so hard to go on with the life I have,
when I think about the memories
that are holding me back.
I try to look foward to the light of tomorrow,
This is my story,
my minuet of sorrow.

Verse 2:
I wake up at the sound
of the broken glass.
The glass that shatters inward
from the hit of the past.
What's the point
of going on anymore?
Wouldn't this life be better with one less
person to ignore?

But as the moment comes closer
in which i resist
then, only
I start to insist
that when I stop thinking
it'll all be clear,
that there's not much time
for the rest of us here.

(repeats chorus)

Bridge:
Then Slowly, so slowly
it all comes clear.
That when we don't go on
the only thing left is fear.
and that sometime soon
people, they'll listen and hear.
they'll start to know there's not much time
for the rest of us here.

End Chorus:
So I try to move on with the life I have,
keep the good memories,
keep them intact.
Start to look foward to the light of tomorrow.
I put back the sound,
of my minuet of sorrow.
#2
at first i thought it was just another stupid suicide emo song but that was really cool how you capped it off, its good
#3
not bad kind of catchy, you keep the same rhyme scheme throughout the whole song and thats always a good thing. The part that caught my attention was the chorus and i like how you worked the title of the song in their so well. All and all its a pretty good piece but you should try to be a little more out there on some of your rhymes......
#5
Quote by i bleed metal
at first i thought it was just another stupid suicide emo song but that was really cool how you capped it off, its good

HAHA. yeas. my frend started reading this and he was liek "this is emo." and i was like "nah, everyone lives and it has a happy ending."