#1
Yes it has no chorus line, I kinda preferred it that way. I am totally new to this writing business, but, hey I haven't failed Language arts class yet. Tell me what you think, anything you find wrong in there, suggestions, anything that could help me out, and of course I'll see to it that I return the favor 'eh? The song is somewhat about the time spent during when a couple fights over something. That is more or less the point at hand. Thank's for reading too

Swear to me,
and I'll side with you.
Everyday that goes is another one without you.
But you never seem to leave my mind.
No matter how furious I am,
If It's said and done and I tend to hate you, you, my whole heart.
You'll still be there.
Wishing for me.
Killing my dreams.
And if it were this way, and it were up to me,
I would love you always.
And complicate the way I hope.
or is it just me, and I do think too much of you.
And time apart, takes away from time that we loved.
Don't decide to even call me.
Consider me for one day.
It's all I ask.
Make way.
My beautiful
Say, with nothing in mind.
With all your loving words,
And every moment you could have ever cared for me,
I could still bet, my whole heart,
I love you more.
#2
well first of all you have to change the name because ''Reprise'' is a famous pantera song and thats infringing a copyright and i don't think you wanna get sued and use more metaphores so you make they song harder to understand (and you don't sound so much the same as everyone else) and use more ryhms

cut the paragragh into either four or five lines on each paragragh and thats how you get a song
#3
Quote by tulsa29
well first of all you have to change the name because ''Reprise'' is a famous pantera song and thats infringing a copyright and i don't think you wanna get sued and use more metaphores so you make they song harder to understand (and you don't sound so much the same as everyone else) and use more ryhms

cut the paragragh into either four or five lines on each paragragh and thats how you get a song

You can't sue someone over song titles.

I mean, I have two songs in my library called Come Back that are completely different. Do you think that the Foo Fighters have sued New Buffalo?
#4
Metaphors I havn't thought of using, I'll see if I could add or exchange a few, see if it works out. For Rhymes, evertime I 'try' to get a good rhyme out of my words, it always sound cheesey, so I just decided so put whatever was on my mind there, and then edit it a bit so it sounds smoother, although i realize that at some points I completely cut out the flow of the song, that's what im worried about. And reprise is just a word meaning "A repetition, or to repeat" so, don't know how you could sue over a word that's in the dictionary. Thanks for your input anyways.
#5
hi, i'd just like to say that was awesome, the kind of stuff i like. especially
"every day that goes is another without you"
it rules!
#6
hi, i'd just like to say that was awesome, the kind of stuff i like. especially
"every day that goes is another without you"
it rules!