Made it up as i went. please enjoy.

(Spoken) Sometimes you're down to your last breath,
your last push,
your last fight before you collapse.
Most people just give up,
But others,
They have this...

The puck is in the home teams end,
Last thirty seconds of the final game,
A defenceman gets crushed into the boards,
But gets the puck and skates despite the pain.

The defenceman is only 4'11',
But determination flares inside,
And he takes each and every hit,
Like buckshot to a rhino hide.

And as he skated towards the net,
The goalie saw a 5 foot train,
The Home team saw a miracle,
and in his eyes there was the Flame.

The Flame will burn your limits,
It will eat away your pain,
It will destroy any weakness,
And you're left with the will to win.

It was 35-35 in the State Champ Football game,
And the other team scored a feild goal
With 10 seconds left on the clock,
And a yong boy's flame was hot like a coal.
I like the idea, but "the flame" and parts that include it seem very lame and cheezy, if this was a sports commercial it'd rule. lol. Instead of being a long piece it should just have little shorts of each story. imo crit mine please Song
Yeah, It is a great idea, but you need to break it up a little more.
Quote by punk_metal
Yeh good advice.
Start convos. Talk to her about stuff that she can relate and reply easily to

Guitar shredding
Footy scores


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