#1
Thinking of calling it
"Reprise"
or
"The Archers Bows have Broken"

Thinking more of just naming it reprise and scrapping the name from my last one.

'Em, here it is. Tell me what you think. I'll do Comment for Comment if you leave a good bit of criticism, you know something helpful, anything, positive and negative are greatly appreciated.


Spiked with urge,
and filled with expectancy.
Skies fell when your breath stroked the air.
And my arrow, aimed so clearly, was faulted.
And crack the draft.
Swear by me and I'll side with you.
I know I deserve worse, but I'm terrified,
That I might never have you anymore.

Never look above
What we could ever have
Because it'll never happen
It's your word, and only you.
And change the way I say,
I'm sorry.

There's no way we can ever be just friends.
I screwed up on that one day, I say and said.
"You've never cared."
But didn't I forgive, and tried to forget.
Your big mistake.
An apology, for anything, I faltered.
My fault, everything.
I can't ever change, perfect in everyway.
and you wear a smile, without me.
You ask why I say.

Never look above
What we could ever have
Because it'll never happen
It's your word, and only you.
And change the way I say,
I'm sorry.

Where did your adoration go.
Every moment you couldn't be without.
It's all gone.
All I want is your words.
I promise I won't turn toned out
And hear every one.
Everyday that you really wanted me,
Wasted, if you can never again count on this.
I'll be here, for you to use,
broken and Bruised.

Never look above
What we could ever have
Because it'll never happen
It's your word, and only you.
My Beautiful

Never look above
What we could ever have
Because it'll never happen
It's your word, and only you.
And change the way I say,
I'm sorry.
#2
I thought it was really strong, I liked the current of desperation that was running through the whole thing. Nothing felt out of place or anything. The only one part that kind of stuck out was the phrase "turn toned out". It just sounds like an awkward way of phrasing what you're trying to say, maybe "tone them out" would work.
Here's a link to one of mine you can crit

http://ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=649064
#4
I like the title Reprise. And good job on the piece.
A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song.