#1
I usually find the highlight of the Pit is when someone posts a funny story, either about themself or a friend or off another site, so I thought we should have a thread for these. I searched for a similar thread, but didn't find anything.

I can't think of any right now, but I might later, so go ahead.
Hello
#2
When I was in third grade, a teacher was walking through the corridor, then she stopped directly in front of our classroom door (probably without realising it was open) and shouted "OH ****!"

That was funneh.

Can't think of anything else.
#4
this morning I got in my car and tought..
'somebody stole my wheel'

I got in at the backseat


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#5
Quote by sashki
When I was in third grade, a teacher was walking through the corridor, then she stopped directly in front of our classroom door (probably without realising it was open) and shouted "OH ****!"

That was funneh.

Can't think of anything else.


If that's all you can think of, your life sucks.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#6
Ha! I thought of one that happened to my friend. I'll tell it as best as I can:

My friend plays football for our under 16 state side, and was in Queensland with the team at their hotel one night. One of the team members ( I think his name is Sam, but im not sure) has a really controlling girlfriend, and she checks his phone to see who he talks to and stuff, so he saves all girls numbers under guys names.
Anyway, he was looking through his numbers, and came across a "Shaun", and couldn't remember who this was, so he sent a message to them. The number turned out to be another team member's (not a fake name for a girl), and Shaun pretended to be this girl called "hannah" or something. They chatted for a while (they were in different rooms), and finally Sam asked for some photos. Shaun had some of some girls boobs, and he sent it to him. Sam asked for some more, and Shaun replied that he wanted some pics first. So Sam gets up, and goes to the bathroom. A few minutes later, Shaun gets a picture of Sam's wang on his phone. He shows this picture to everyone on the team, and then they take a photo of them all pointing to the phone laughing, and send this to Sam. He copped alot of crap for the rest of that trip, but nobody told his girlfriend...

Well, that might have been funny to you, but you kind of have to know these people to understand it properly...
Hello
#7
If that's all you can think of, your life sucks.


Yeah, thats what I was thinking...

this morning I got in my car and tought..
'somebody stole my wheel'

I got in at the backseat


I laughed, I wasn't expecting that...
Hello
#8
Quote by Jaxoo
Ha! I thought of one that happened to my friend. I'll tell it as best as I can:

My friend plays football for our under 16 state side, and was in Queensland with the team at their hotel one night. One of the team members ( I think his name is Sam, but im not sure) has a really controlling girlfriend, and she checks his phone to see who he talks to and stuff, so he saves all girls numbers under guys names.
Anyway, he was looking through his numbers, and came across a "Shaun", and couldn't remember who this was, so he sent a message to them. The number turned out to be another team member's (not a fake name for a girl), and Shaun pretended to be this girl called "hannah" or something. They chatted for a while (they were in different rooms), and finally Sam asked for some photos. Shaun had some of some girls boobs, and he sent it to him. Sam asked for some more, and Shaun replied that he wanted some pics first. So Sam gets up, and goes to the bathroom. A few minutes later, Shaun gets a picture of Sam's wang on his phone. He shows this picture to everyone on the team, and then they take a photo of them all pointing to the phone laughing, and send this to Sam. He copped alot of crap for the rest of that trip, but nobody told his girlfriend...

Well, that might have been funny to you, but you kind of have to know these people to understand it properly...



that is hillarious! That is why you stand up for yourself to your gf...

pepsi
#9
A chav tried to soak me by driving into a puddle on the edge of the road, he came swerving at me with drum and bass going, somehow he failed, missed the puddle, bounced off the curb and swerved infront of another car, not particularly funny, but was alright, Oh and i stepped on a used johnny at a trivium gig, and there was an outline of a condom in jiz on my shoe
#10
Once i was driving around listening to some drum n bass and i saw this guy on the sidewalk and there was puddles everywhere so i thought i would try n soak him, but i somehow failed and bounced off the curb then i swerved infront of this other car, it wasn't really funny but its the only story i could thing of. Oh and another time i was at this trivium gig and i found a used johnny in my pocket from the other night, so i just threw it on the ground.
#12
Quote by roastchicken
Once i was driving around listening to some drum n bass and i saw this guy on the sidewalk and there was puddles everywhere so i thought i would try n soak him, but i somehow failed and bounced off the curb then i swerved infront of this other car, it wasn't really funny but its the only story i could thing of. Oh and another time i was at this trivium gig and i found a used johnny in my pocket from the other night, so i just threw it on the ground.


lol

not really funny, but Michelle Dewberry the winner of the Apprentice 2 UK was in our college and i walked right past her staring at her retardedly trying to think where i recognised her and then as i passed her i said to my freind really loudly "OMG! THAT FIT WOMEN IS MICHELLE OF THE APPRENTICE!" and she turned around
#14
I got a story.
This guy, once, he used the search bar.
Hard to believe, right?
Quote by Vornik
Thanks for the advice. I'm going to put it, along with your other advice, into a book, the pages of which I will then use to wipe my ass.
#15
Quote by dann_blood
I got a story.
This guy, once, he used the search bar.
Hard to believe, right?


lmao , dude are you being serial !?! what happened next?
#16
When I was 12. I used to choke slam (The Move of undertaker from WWE) pillows. One day I decided to do the same to my neighbor’s dog. And that son of a bitch bit me so many times on my hand that I was rushed to the hospital.
Hi
#17
I masturbated while on my computer once and my mom came home and was about to come into the computer room to say hi to me. I had roughly 7 seconds to click off the porno and change back into clothes. I did it, and ever since I make sure my Mom is going to be out for a while if I do that.
Listen to my songs, but only if you are prepared for the greatest experience of your life .
#19
Quote by noxiosimitator
this morning I got in my car and tought..
'somebody stole my wheel'

I got in at the backseat




That was incredible.


Anyway, this isn't really funny, as you kind of had to be there.


There were these 2 people at school sitting on a bench outside the staff room. I don't know what they were doing, but they were pretty much all over each other, probably making out, etc. Then a ridiculous teacher stuck his head out the staff room window and started absolutely screaming. The conversation went like this:


Teacher: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

Student M: ...

Teacher: WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH HER?

Student M: Kissing

Teacher: GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER NOW!!!

Everyone within 50m: ... wtf?

Teacher: GET AWAY FROM HER NOW!

Student M: *slowly starts moving away*

Teacher: SHE'S IN TEARS FOR GOODNESS SAKE!

Student M: ?

Everyone within 50m: Lol what a douche poor kids are just in love.

Teacher: *leaves building and come outside.

Student M and F: *hugging*


From here on the teacher pretty much yelled and carried on while the male student, as anyone would have, mouthed off, before the 2 of them were lead to a door, which turned out to be locked, then to another door, which was not.

The thing is, this happens with the teacher every day, at least 3 times that I know of and I'm sure there are more. Oh, and by the way, in grade 8 he told me not to swear when I said 'jerk'.


Once again though, you kind of have to know everyone involved.
#20
Ok I got one.
So I went down to this juice place to get a drink. Now the deal there is that if there are a lot of people in there they ask for your name so they can call you're name when the drink is ready. So, I walk in and I'm the only person in there besides the three people behind the counter(two girls and 1 guy). So I go up to the lady taking orders and I order my drink, and here's what she said, "Can I get your name?"- Now remember I said they only do that when a lot of people are there... so it's pretty much pointless for her to write my name. So I said my name and I wanted to just say "Hey, umm... I don't know if you've noticed, just pointing out but umm... I'm the only person here." but I'm better then that. So when my drink is finally done, the girl that made it was about to hand it to me then, she pulled it back and yelled "Colby, your Razzamatazz." like there were tons of other people there. So I'm standing there like "Ok...", the two girls are smiling like nothing is wrong and the guy behind them is like "Wtf?"


Kind of you had to be there story. But I already typed out so I don't give a damn.
#22
we're staying at this hotel place, and i walked into a room and started talking to what i thought was my mom, but it was actually the housekeeping lady. god that was embarrassing!!

This is Larry The If you click him, he will give you magic powers.
srsly.


If you are not willing to die for the perfect s'more, Then you don't deserve a s'more at all.