#1
If you could have it anywhere you wanted where whould you place your penis?


I would put it on the palm of my hand so I could run around chasin people with it.

"get that thing away from me you freak"

"if it gets any closer to my face"...

"ywpoaodfyaoiao!"

*choking*
#3
I would put it on my penis....
Quote by cnut
When I was eight, me and my best friend started "practicing for girls".
Which involved us going into the woods, and him sticking his dick in my ass.
The last time we did it, his sister caught us.

use AVG as your anti-virus
#5
I would somehow have it so it could move about my body to absolutely anywhere, so you could be just lazin around with a girl and suddenly BAM! leg penis!
#7
I would put below my stomach where that empty patch of skin would be. Right above the balls.
#11
Quote by Grundy0
Oh dear god.


What the hell kind of a question is that?


a question that says where would you have a penis given the choice.


Here look, I'll make a rhyme

If I could have a dick in any place
such as in my palm to shove my hand in their face
It would bring me great joys to see
what reactions people would have to my dick and me



*doo doo doo doo doo doo doo*

*whistle whistle*
#12
I'd replace my index finger with my penis, so I can give myself anal.
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#13
Quote by classicrockrox
If you could have it anywhere you wanted where whould you place your penis?


I would put it on the palm of my hand so I could run around chasin people with it.



if you had a dick on your palm, you wouldn't be able to play guitar.
"There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. Some kind of high powered mutant never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."-Duke
#14
tr00 dat.

Im in quite a predicament...

Maybe I should get horny before playing and get my dick all stiff and use it as a pick?


!m a g3n1us!!lulz
#15
Quote by Ex'sAndOh's
I'd replace my index finger with my penis, so I can give myself anal.



Some things should just be kept to ones self...
#16
I would put it on my nose so that when I lie it gets bigger and it would blow right into a girls mouth. I have a good aim....
Quote by GodofGuitar1991
you are a real guitarist when you are not ashamed about masturbating to musicians friend magazine.
#17
I'd replace my tongue with my penis. It'd be great for licking girls out. And seeing as I don't actually get that action I could just give myself a constant blowjob Good times
Quote by whiteraven119
My new hero. Anyone willing to use lethal martial arts against hxc kids is amazing.

That's me

Quote by jaridv1
my penis has a restraining order against me because i beat it

#19
You wouldn't have happened to have watched Edward Penishands by any chance, would you, TS?
According to BS statistics, 92% of teens have moved on to rap. If you're among the 8% who doesn't consider rap to be real music, donate your brains, as you clearly aren't using them.
#21
Quote by Ex'sAndOh's
I'd replace my index finger with my penis, so I can give myself anal.


+1

....Except to the anal part.... I had trouble sticking my finger up my ass putting in a suppository... I couldnt do that... Its a one way street...

But on my index finger I could like... Go at it harder with a woman cause damn it does my back in... WHY WONT YOU WOMEN EVER GO ON TOP!?
Sat in a lab, curing diseases. They actually LET me play with chemicals!
#22
Quote by Ex'sAndOh's
I'd replace my index finger with my penis, so I can give myself anal.


lol, I just thought about Scary Movie 3.

"Looks like we're not that different after all"
Gear
Schecter C-1 Artist
Vox AD15VT
Epiphone EJ-200 Acoustic
#24
Quote by AceOfBlades
I would somehow have it so it could move about my body to absolutely anywhere, so you could be just lazin around with a girl and suddenly BAM! leg penis!

We have a winner!

That'd be awesome. I'd go around poking girls with it and they wouldn't have a clue.
Quote by fukyu1980
LOL ! muther fuker i was gonna say that LOL!
#25
I would put it in my mouth.
derp
lol u have faggot in ur username


Quote by Jack Off Jill
You know, if you, Silent Deftone and I get together.. We'd be unstoppable at the night clubs.


Everything I say is to be taken as serious fucking business.
#26
Quote by AceOfBlades
I would somehow have it so it could move about my body to absolutely anywhere, so you could be just lazin around with a girl and suddenly BAM! leg penis!



Absolute winner. You sir, are a comedy genius!

Quote by GLP_Arclite
Pooping is well good though, to be fair.


I've got a handle on the fiction.

I'm losing my grip, 'cos I'm losing my fingers.
#28
Quote by Jersey_Zombie
In Jessica Alba



+1... or my girlfriend since u seem to already have jessica alba...
Quote by bpoeoanry
go back to sleep
Waking up with boobs? Is there a visine for that.