#1
Hi. I haven't been on UG in aaaaaages. But I thought I should get back into it
For those a bit confused about the chorus/title, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Numbers_station and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lincolnshire_Poacher_%28numbers_station%29

This is a song about conspiracy theorists. Please crit and I'll do likewise.

Sit back and relapse
They'll read me stories 'bout it
Let it all collapse
A nadir well thought out, it
was all planned you know
don't let on for a second
Don't you tell a soul
Not while the cameras beckon

We all swore it was this week's omen
In bitter pill form
So cheer on your showman
and ignore the storm

(Chorus)
Lincolnshire poacher
why don't you
sing me to sleep?
I've got foxholes to hide in
and secrets to keep

Lincolnshire poacher
why won't you
read me the truth?
Our man in Havana's never
had it so good

Oh please oh please don't leave me
Cos I need you to need me
(You got your soapboxes carved from glass)
Oh please oh please don't leave me
I need you to bleed for me
(Better start your engines so your getaway's still fast)

(Chorus)

(Break)
I know you'd love to hear my opinions
Surely I can change the world!

(Chorus)
#2
The first line "Sit back a relapse" is actually, although I am sure you didn't mean to do this, part of the refrain from Panic! At The Disco's song "Camisado." Other than that, I liked this song, it is the kind of style that I like. The chorous has a nice flow, in my opinion. The last two lines of the chrous are kind of strange, I am not sure what you are trying to say. Overall I liked this song. Good work.

"Reel Her In"
#3
Quote by Motown Acoustic
The first line "Sit back a relapse" is actually, although I am sure you didn't mean to do this, part of the refrain from Panic! At The Disco's song "Camisado." Other than that, I liked this song, it is the kind of style that I like. The chorous has a nice flow, in my opinion. The last two lines of the chrous are kind of strange, I am not sure what you are trying to say. Overall I liked this song. Good work.

Is it?
*check*

So it is.

Bah. That wasn't intentional. Ah well. YOU SAW NOTHING.

Also, 'Our Man In Havana' is a book about spies by Graham Greene. Excellent book, I'd recommend it (along with his other, most famous novel, Brighton Rock)
Last edited by Easty1 at Sep 7, 2007,
#4
Mm. I've got no complaints. Great flow, though I think the "it" on the tail end of the fourth line, while necessary for the rhyme, is a tad bit awkward. Great work.
Member #4 of the "I have parents over 50 and i'm a teen" club, pm tanglewoodguit to join.
#5
thanks for commenting on mine, here goes...


Quote by Easty1
Hi. I haven't been on UG in aaaaaages. But I thought I should get back into it
For those a bit confused about the chorus/title, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Numbers_station and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lincolnshire_Poacher_%28numbers_station%29

This is a song about conspiracy theorists. Please crit and I'll do likewise.

Sit back and relapse
They'll read me stories 'bout it
Let it all collapse
A nadir well thought out, it
was all planned you know
don't let on for a second
Don't you tell a soul
Not while the cameras beckon

Well thought out i especially like that last line.


We all swore it was this week's omen
In bitter pill form
So cheer on your showman
and ignore the storm


(Chorus)
Lincolnshire poacher
why don't you
sing me to sleep?
I've got foxholes to hide in
and secrets to keep

Lincolnshire poacher
why won't you
read me the truth?
Our man in Havana's never
had it so good

Oh please oh please don't leave me
Cos I need you to need me
(You got your soapboxes carved from glass)
Oh please oh please don't leave me
I need you to bleed for me
(Better start your engines so your getaway's still fast)

This i a good verse, (man, i feel really lame saying that kind of thing, but theres not much else to say sorry)


(Chorus)

(Break)
I know you'd love to hear my opinions
Surely I can change the world!

(Chorus)


I feel really bad about not doing a better job, but this is a good job. My apologies.