#1
My latest creation, but not one of my really serious songs I guess. I started out doing this as an acoustic song, but it just turned into metalcore somehow haha. Anyways, I also threw in some if the riffs I wrote for the metalcore collab thread, and I also attempted to do some vocal melodies. Give me some some suggestions on how I can improve stuff, and I'll try and get to your songs as soon as I can.
Attachments:
Epic Metalcore.zip
Last edited by zakatak9389 at Oct 7, 2007,
#2
THAT WAS EPIC...

Seriously, ****ing epic. The only thing i didnt like was that the intro (which was beatiful) was a little too long for my taste...but it was EPIC
Quote by justinrobbins7
*unzipppp* "Deal with this, wench."



Quote by Mazzakazza
Ug Knows 1000% More About Scrotal Sacs Than Real Doctors.
Hm Let Me Investigate. You Has The Painful Scroties? You Has Aids.
Next Plz.
#3
Very good, man. The intro is very epic..acoustic and strings and the whole deal. Very nice. The solo was good too. You transitioned it very well into the next part, having the electric over the acoustics like that. I don't think it's too long. I would keep it just like it is.

I really like the main theme. That melody is very good.

The transition to the pre-chorus is a little weird at first, but I think it's the drums. The riff is good though.

Chorus is good. Again, the transition is a little off sounding, but just in the drum beat.

The solo is very good, not too crazy or anything, and it's very melodic. I like it a lot.

Great song, dude. The only suggestion I can give is to work on the transitions between parts, but I think it's mostly just in the drums.
#5
Ahh that was great. You did a good job on drums there...especially in "Pre Chorus II"...

I don't usually listen to metalcore so I don't know what it really is like. But I liked this alot. Good use of strings. (except in intro. The first chord in the last measure of the progression was off)

8/10

Plz crit one of mine in sig?
#6
Haha, used your riff from the metalcore collab thread I see. I think its really good, but for the vocal part, use an oboe as the instrument instead of flute. Overall, I think it should be a bit longer, and there should be more riffs. Theres only like 3 different ones? I found the solo kinda boring though until the end. 7.5/10
#7
Ok crit as i go:

Intro - amazing, pretty much flawless use of the acoustics and I've always been impressed with how you use your keyboard section - can't really add anything more here. Good transition as well.

Main Theme - meh it's alright, not a particularly inspiring lead line tbh...it's not bad i just don't find it catchy. Not a fan of the drums either I'm afraid to say. The lead does get better when you harmonise it though

Verse 1 - Yep good bit here, not too complicated and the vocal line sounds like it'll carry it well. Beautiful riff in the pre-chorus, again especially when harmonised and the strings from 82 suit it perfectly - good work

Chorus - it's ok but again not particularly catchy, maybe with actual vocals rather than a flute it might help...liked the little piano bit in the next verse as well, somehow managed not to sound contrived

Pre-Solo - does it's job and builds up to the solo - can't ask any more

Solo - Not one of your best. It's good but there's just something missing; Lunar Flare had that awesome bend at the start, Frozen In Time was just generally amazing, and while this isn't bad it just lacks something...dunno can't really explain it much better than that i'm afraid. Good bit of harmonising again at the end.

Outro - Very much liked the string rush at the end, maybe hold onto that for the epic feel? Last bar sounded a bit odd though.

Overall it's good, just seems not to be up to your usual standards I feel...with a bit of work it could be very nice though. Edit the solo a bit and maybe muck about with the main theme. Sorry if this sounds overly-critical...i don't believe in just writing: 8/10 mostly good

Crit mine? : https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=670553
#9
Quote by b101
Ok crit as i go:

Intro - amazing, pretty much flawless use of the acoustics and I've always been impressed with how you use your keyboard section - can't really add anything more here. Good transition as well.

Main Theme - meh it's alright, not a particularly inspiring lead line tbh...it's not bad i just don't find it catchy. Not a fan of the drums either I'm afraid to say. The lead does get better when you harmonise it though

Verse 1 - Yep good bit here, not too complicated and the vocal line sounds like it'll carry it well. Beautiful riff in the pre-chorus, again especially when harmonised and the strings from 82 suit it perfectly - good work

Chorus - it's ok but again not particularly catchy, maybe with actual vocals rather than a flute it might help...liked the little piano bit in the next verse as well, somehow managed not to sound contrived

Pre-Solo - does it's job and builds up to the solo - can't ask any more

Solo - Not one of your best. It's good but there's just something missing; Lunar Flare had that awesome bend at the start, Frozen In Time was just generally amazing, and while this isn't bad it just lacks something...dunno can't really explain it much better than that i'm afraid. Good bit of harmonising again at the end.

Outro - Very much liked the string rush at the end, maybe hold onto that for the epic feel? Last bar sounded a bit odd though.

Overall it's good, just seems not to be up to your usual standards I feel...with a bit of work it could be very nice though. Edit the solo a bit and maybe muck about with the main theme. Sorry if this sounds overly-critical...i don't believe in just writing: 8/10 mostly good

Crit mine? : https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=670553


thanks a lot man, I'm always glad to see detailed crits like this. And yeah, I know that this song isn't quite as good as a lot of my other ones. I didn't really put a lot of effort into it like I usually do, like lunar flare or frozen in time like ya mentioned. So yeah, I appreciate your advice man. I'll try to get around to critting yours as soon as I can.
#10
Man your acoustic stuff shines as usual, especially when the second acoustic comes in. the main melody is amazing especially harmonised. the next riff was a bit lacklustre but the prechorus was a sweet riff. the chorus was simple but obviously vocals would sort that out. The solo was genious as per usual, melodic and shreddy and just general goodness it kinda just ended a bit abruply tho maybe have a little outro melody.
#11
I really like the intro, epic beyond expectations, the keyboard suits perfectly
And the second guitar part on the intro is beautiful
And the third part too!

The 'Main Theme' kicks ass

As does the verse, the vocal line sounds good too


Ah man it's pointless me going bit by bit, I love it all, s'fantastic *thumbs up*

Don't worry too much about critting mine back, probably going to scrap it anyway
#12
Very epic, i enjoyed how it built up.

The intro was very cool also.
UNFORGIVEABLE
#14
Beginning is amazingly beautiful... epic indeed. The strings come in and sound fitting and wonderful. Especially when you get the acoustic mini-solo on high notes before the electric comes in. Which also sounds wonderful. Love when th tempo seems to pick up (which it doesnt, but nice feel to it), nice fast pace. You dont overdo the guitars, which happens all too often.

Love the whole piece, man. Crit mine? In my sig.
#16
Oh my god. I was just coming in R&R to check on my Kristal thread, but somehow I clicked the link to this as it was the latest thread. I don't really have a useful crit here, but I just feel the need to say that was epic and if you ever make that into a real, recorded song please tell me. The only thing I wasn't a fan of was the solo. It's not that it wasn't bad or anything, I just think that another solo would've fit better. But, I don't listen to metalcore usually, so that shouldn't be taken too seriously.

EPIC!
Ben
#18
Gah, this is ****ing great, as always.

Acoustic intro is nice, the acousitc and electric solos are both stellar.

Main theme is generic, but still good. It uses the same chord progression as a My Chemical Romance song.

The vocals over the verse are nothing spoecial, but they get the job done.

I like the riff over the pre-chorus.

The chorus is really chorusy.

It was cool how you sped it up for the solo, Dragonforce style.

The solo didn't really sitck out for me, since you had the guitar soloing for almost the whole song. But bar 162-165 = OMG!

So yeah, that was ****ing great, as said before. 9/10.

You can crit any song in my sig, But I'd prefer the last one, "Another metal Song" Thanks.
I'm a person.
Last edited by PinkIsCool at Oct 14, 2007,
#19
Well done! This is amazing stuff!! I love all of the guitar compositions in this song! the prechorus made me pee myself lol. but seriously solid work man. see a lot of skill in the guitar world, but I rarely see I lot of creativity and imagination. Well done.

crit: I think your keyboard tracks were a little to loud, they covered up the song a bit if you know what I meen.
#20
"Epics!"

Yeah, sorry. That was great, I can see why it took 2 months or so. The only thing I can offer is that you work some more on the double kick drums, they tend to get repetitive. That's just me though, it is outstanding work.


-Codims
My iPod could do that in like 5 seconds.
#22
Ah, definetely epic. The keys on guitar pro get on my nerves though, but I'm sure that's just because of GP. The intro was absolutely brilliant, it definetely wasn't to long. Everything flows together pretty nice too. I like how the intro didn't really start out fast, but worked it's way faster. Good job
8/10

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?p=11213991#post11213991
My Gear
Ibanez SR520EX with EMG 81/85 and boost
Peavey Valveking Head w/ Crate Blue Voodoo Cab
Peavey VB-2
Spector Euro 4
Boss NS-2
Boss TU-2
#23
this...

is one of the better things ive heard on here =]

sounds great, though it gets slightly same-y near the end, bring some change into it

the acoustic intro is fooking awesome =] best part

9.5/10 =]

crit mine? "hellbound believer", look to my sig