#1
K i deleted the last thread as ive kinda just completely changed this. ive now made it all piano apart from an acoustic solo, i might even add in another piano for extra coolness but i dunno if i could get it to fit in nicely without everything becoming too cluttered, ill see.

Check it out tho. im very happy with this now. Ive arranged it for piano but it can all be played by one person on piano me thinks, ill give it a go tomorrow.

This is 'Memories Lost In Time'

Attachments:
MemoriesLostPiano.zip
Last edited by ch715dallat at Sep 12, 2007,
#4
thanks man, i think i might take out the repeats and make it more of an instrumental, ill do a bit of work on it tomorrow, its just when you write a section you like, it feels natural to repeat it lol
#5
big fan of this - it's a bit simple for my taste but it's good to see something different around. So as I listen:

Intro - good, nice and simple, don't want to get too complex too fast

Main Theme - very nice little duet kinda thing you have there. I'm a big fan of this section

Duet - This sounds a little empty to me...maybe have one playing some full chords behind this? I assume you'll have vocals over this but still, would be better with a bit more depth. The break to the main theme again works well.

Solo - First thought is that the drums here are awful - I'm sure they sound better out of gpro but on here they ruin what is actually a very nice solo....sounds quite Petrucci-esque in places. Only thing is there isn't a main idea or phrase that you can identify with. Just a slow few notes or something that are catchy - you'll know it when you find it

Break - Not bad at all but the quick transition sounds a bit jerky - muck about with it and see what you get

Back to Main - Absolutely love the way the drums re-enter - sounds perfect! And a good little finish, although personally i'd slow the tempo down and finish with a full chord - depends which you prefer.

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Mainly I think this suffers from a lack of depth. Try experimenting with some 'fuller' chords, add9's etc. Try to emphasise the thirds in the chords as well as they give the chord it's colour, and with that will come your atmosphere! Nice piece of work though - has a lot of potential

7/10

If you wouldn't mind critting mine?

https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=670553
#6
Definately an improvement. Before it was an average acoustic instrumental, but now it's a pretty emotional piano piece. Easy to play too! I think the main theme could do with a bit of spicing up. Maybe instead of playing the same riff on two different strings, one of the pianos could hold a chord while doing the riff, just to give a different element to the track. Still not a fan of the guitar solo...maybe a crazy 16 not arpeggio run from both the pianos in a duet would fit better?

=]
#7
i would but im kinda intending to record it as a guitar piece and my sweeping sucksass just a little, then again i might just go completely for an instrumental here and ramp up the complexity. also yeah the drumssuck, i just put the same beat everywhere cos i couldnt be bothered with them yet

Edit: ill get yours later b104 its just my torrent keeps crashing if i have a browser open an i need this thing download.
Last edited by ch715dallat at Sep 12, 2007,