he wasn't half as clever
as his words had implied.

We chuckled
when his ego
was hit by the door
on the way out.

Eh. I doubt I'll return on this, as there's not really much to crit.
Had this little piece in me in a while finally got it down in a way I enjoy.
Not much to crit at all, Jamie. There's a thought there, but it doesn't build or go anywhere.

Not one of your more stellar pieces.
Quote by Jackal58
I release my inner liberal every morning when I take a shit.
Quote by SK8RDUDE411
I wont be like those jerks who dedicate their beliefs to logic and reaosn.
Although I thought it has great potential, I didn't quite like it as a standalone piece. It seems like this should have been a part of a prose piece. You know. As a sentence.

Sorry for the honesty, if that makes sense.

edit : Oh, and, what she said