#1
I was born in good old Indiana in a hospital. When I was 1 I started my own business selling my own sexy baby pictures online. When I was 3 I became a millionaire. Then I wasted my riches to buy Jessica Alba's virginity. When I was 6 i started school then dropped out cuz all the teachers tried to player hate on me. When I was 8 I became a boobology surgeon so I can see hot tits and bang some hot chicks while they were drugged. I got fired when I was 11 because of numerous patient completes of STD's.
When I was 11 I went into the Music Industry. I made my own album entitle "Your Mom and my One-Eyed Wonder Weasel, and the Garbanzo Brothers." It went multi-platinum in 1 day to the hit single "When Icy Hot meets the Barell Roll." Then when I was 13 me and Chuck Norris had a bet whoever can bang the most girls in 5 years is sexier.
I beat him 140,694 to his 140,693(3somes only counted if it was 2 girls). Soon afterwards I contracted penile and testicular cancer. They chopped of my weasel and the Garbanzo bros. and replaced it with 2 balls of steel and a banana with artificial sperm. So I had chemo for 3 years. When I was 24 i was placed in the nut house for 7 years. When I got out I married Jessica Alba and we had 3 kids Freddy,Jason, and Esteban el' Francisco Cabana. 5 years later when I was Jessica silly my banana peel fell of and I slipped causing my banana to break off and me to bleed to death.
I was buried in Toronto,Canada the site of my online pr0n company(Pizza Ready Online Network.) The Vice President of my pr0n company wasn't cool enough so Chuck Norris round-house kicked him in the face and became the new President.
#5
This would make a good thread if everyone were to post their own life stories. Unfortunately I'm playing World of Warcraft right now so I can't post mines.

But everyone else, feel free
Gear

Fender Stratocaster in Red.

It's all I need.

The Anti-Anti-Ibanez Militia!
#8
Quote by eldanny
Another reason to lose faith in humanity


Wow, I can use that 2 threads in a row
El-Danny

Quote by americnidiot
You keep seeing songs like KoC, SMBH, and Hysteria showing up on games, but I want Micro Cuts on either Rock Band or Sing Star. I want to see numerous masses of kids staring at the tv wondering what the hell they're supposed to do.
#11
sweet sounds alot like my life story
"A little word for my enemies and fortune seekers -
go fuck your Jesus..... he likes it up the ass!!"
Glen Benton
#13
Erm.... What?
██████████████████████
██████████████████████
██████████████████████
██████████████████████
██████████████████████
██
████████████████████
██
████████████████████
██████████████████████
#14
Quote by SamTotman
This would make a good thread if everyone were to post their own life stories. Unfortunately I'm playing World of Warcraft right now so I can't post mines.

But everyone else, feel free


haha what a n0b
#15
Now this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became the prince of a town called bel-air

In west philadelfia born and raised
On the playground where I spent most of my days
Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool
And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys said "we’re up in no good"
Started making trouble in my neighbourhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
And said "you’re moving with your aunte and uncle in bel-air"

(only the first three episodes of season one)

I begged and pleaded with her the other day
But she packed my suitcase and sent me on my way
She gave me a kissin’ and she gave me my ticket
I put my walkman on and said I might aswell kick it

First class, yo this is bad,
Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass
Is this what the people of bel-air livin’ like,
Hmm this might be alright!

I whistled for a cab and when it came near the
Licensplate said "fresh" and had a dice in the mirror
If anything I could say that this cab was rare
But I thought now forget it, yo home to bel-air

I pulled up to a house about seven or eight
And I yelled to the cabby "yo, home smell you later"
Looked at my kingdom I was finally there
To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air

There's mine.
#16
tbh your existence is pointless, a jump into a bottomless pit would have been a better use of time
Quote by Atomic48
Nothing's impossible if you have the proper artillery.


Quote by Prole
In-depth common sense, at your service.


I Witnessed The Glory Of GORHL!

"It all shall fall, by the grace of the people." - ZDLR in Producer.
#17
I just need a place to out my personal reminders, and I think this thread is is perfect. Just ignore this post. Remember to pick up razors to shave that sleeping midget on the bus. Do something funny like gluing his pubes on his face like eyebrows so that he looks constantly surprised. Also, use gloves to avoid getting midget on your hands.
Quote by p o e
lmfao man thats so sick and depraved and yet funny all at once

my hats off to you IbanezSA160, you have embodied the Pit into one little poem
#19
Quote by bequickorbedead
Man, I'm disapponted, no fresh prince? Is that not just cool anymore...?


Quote by Dirge Humani
Now this is the story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute just sit right there
I’ll tell you how I became the prince of a town called bel-air

In west philadelfia born and raised
On the playground where I spent most of my days
Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool
And all shooting some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys said "we’re up in no good"
Started making trouble in my neighbourhood
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared
And said "you’re moving with your aunte and uncle in bel-air"

(only the first three episodes of season one)

I begged and pleaded with her the other day
But she packed my suitcase and sent me on my way
She gave me a kissin’ and she gave me my ticket
I put my walkman on and said I might aswell kick it

First class, yo this is bad,
Drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass
Is this what the people of bel-air livin’ like,
Hmm this might be alright!

I whistled for a cab and when it came near the
Licensplate said "fresh" and had a dice in the mirror
If anything I could say that this cab was rare
But I thought now forget it, yo home to bel-air

I pulled up to a house about seven or eight
And I yelled to the cabby "yo, home smell you later"
Looked at my kingdom I was finally there
To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air

There's mine.


My faith in humanity has returned
#20
Quote by Vivalaskater94
I was born in good old Indiana in a hospital. When I was 1 I started my own business selling my own sexy baby pictures online. When I was 3 I became a millionaire. Then I wasted my riches to buy Jessica Alba's virginity. When I was 6 i started school then dropped out cuz all the teachers tried to player hate on me. When I was 8 I became a boobology surgeon so I can see hot tits and bang some hot chicks while they were drugged. I got fired when I was 11 because of numerous patient completes of STD's.
When I was 11 I went into the Music Industry. I made my own album entitle "Your Mom and my One-Eyed Wonder Weasel, and the Garbanzo Brothers." It went multi-platinum in 1 day to the hit single "When Icy Hot meets the Barell Roll." Then when I was 13 me and Chuck Norris had a bet whoever can bang the most girls in 5 years is sexier.
I beat him 140,694 to his 140,693(3somes only counted if it was 2 girls). Soon afterwards I contracted penile and testicular cancer. They chopped of my weasel and the Garbanzo bros. and replaced it with 2 balls of steel and a banana with artificial sperm. So I had chemo for 3 years. When I was 24 i was placed in the nut house for 7 years. When I got out I married Jessica Alba and we had 3 kids Freddy,Jason, and Esteban el' Francisco Cabana. 5 years later when I was Jessica silly my banana peel fell of and I slipped causing my banana to break off and me to bleed to death.
I was buried in Toronto,Canada the site of my online pr0n company(Pizza Ready Online Network.) The Vice President of my pr0n company wasn't cool enough so Chuck Norris round-house kicked him in the face and became the new President.


You banged 140, 694 chicks in 5 years? That's 77 a day.... unitil I did the math, I believed your story.
Those who have crossed
With direct eyes, to death's other Kingdom
Remember us - if at all - not as lost
Violent souls, but only
As the hollow men
The stuffed men.