#1
i went to 711 with some friends today, one of em older then me and the other and he got some condoms, but he didnt want his mom to find them. so he gave them to my other friend to keep for him. so my friend is a dumbass and decides to hide them in the garage. so his mom comes home and finds a 711 bag of a 12pack of condums and a bawls energy drink. so he got the sex talk. his moms pretty chill so she just said she told him not to get any girls pregnant. then he said this. "thats why i got the condoms dumbass." then she was like. excuse me. then he was like. "oh **** that was a stupid statement. ****. im gonna stop talking" then she told him to go put them away and she didnt want to see them. then he said he came down later for dinner, just them two. he said it was the most awkward dinner ever with pizza bagel bites.

it may not sound that funny but it was funny to us. post your funny stories of your day.
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#5
My "entertaining" story

Today while walking home, I passed this group of guys and they started talking to me like a bunch of idiots trying to be impressive, and one of them said
"You wanna have sex?"
I'm like "No thanks."
And he's like "But whyyy?"
I shot him a dirty look and then I was with my iPod,
so I said, "I'd f*** my iPod before i'd ever think of f***ing you, "
And he actually got really offended. (I'm a girl btw)

I just thought it was funny how offended he got [:
Lol, I passed them later too, they didn't say anything that time.
#6
Ok, so one time me, my friend and his girlfriend were at a movie theater. It was after the movie, and we were really bored. so we walked around for a while and we found a party america. Inside we got a bunch of hats. i got a sombrero and they got derby hats. so then we get back to the movie theater, just chillin with our hats y'know, then the ppl that work there turn the fountain on (we were sitting on it). We all got wet, so then I (being really pissed off) stole my friends hat, went up to the fountain, then I whistled for a cab and when it came near the Licensplate said fresh and had a dice in the mirror If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought now forget it, yo home to bel-air I pulled up to a house about seven or eight And I yelled to the cabby yo, home smell you later Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air
#7
Leave the "Fresh Prince" in 4chan...
Quote by bigredbeast
how much is 15,000 PHP? I didn't know they played guitar in the Phillipines. I thought they played ukelele or something.


Because, of course, we're too far away from places with guitars and all that stuff so we play ukelele...
#8
I got offered a job as a male prostitute. I made a thread about it already.
I've had Alzheimer's Disease for as long as I can remember.

Quote by damian_91
Pleasure2kill, you are a genius!