#1
hey this is one of my songs comments would be great and suggestion for a song title

she sleeps in her tomb
and doesnt awake
till the break of noon
before day break

she looks in the mirror
theres no refelection
shes a vampire
with no affection

she will rip ur soul out
turn it to dust
the pleasure she gets from turning
love to lust
#2
Sounds not too bad, except for how the first verse makes no sense...I'd change that if I were you.

Edit: Also change the second last line of the song to something more like, "She takes pleasure from" it would make more sense to me anyway.
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Last edited by Blackballed at Sep 26, 2007,
#3
hey thnx yeh i wasnt too keen on the first verse either and thnx for the suggestions