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#1
so i've been goin out with this great girl for over 2 months and we haven't done much in the way of sex. we've felt each other up not too badly and that's about the extent of it. she talks dirty to me every once in a while and we've talked about it and we've agreed we'll do some stuff.... but i feel guilty doing that kind of stuff to her. even though she wants it. i think i'd look at her differently if i did much more... i'd think her more of a slut or something i'm not sure.... but i kinda think it wouldn't be very good for us. so anyone got any advice? WTF IS WRONG WITH ME?!

(ps its not that i wouldnt want sex... i just don't feel right doing it to her and think i'd look at her differently in a worse way.)
#3
Just means you're not ready.

I was like you before, I'd look at someone I like and couldn't possibly imagine doing anything more than hug / make out.

Then a couple of years passed and now I'd bang my girlfriend in a heartbeat (theoretically... single atm)
#7
i think i know what you're talking about and i've experienced it to a degree...you just need to realize that she wants to do things with you and there is nothing wrong with it...just don't let sex become the the basis of the relationship
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#10
pics or it didn't happen
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#12
your body is going through some changes right now......
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#13
I think I've had this happen in a less dire way...I couldn't imagine sex with this girl that I liked, and who liked me, because I loved her personality so much. I'm a freak too
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#15
Quote by Teh_Guitarer
so i've been goin out with this great girl for over 2 months and we haven't done much in the way of sex. we've felt each other up not too badly and that's about the extent of it. she talks dirty to me every once in a while and we've talked about it and we've agreed we'll do some stuff.... but i feel guilty doing that kind of stuff to her. even though she wants it. i think i'd look at her differently if i did much more... i'd think her more of a slut or something i'm not sure.... but i kinda think it wouldn't be very good for us. so anyone got any advice? WTF IS WRONG WITH ME?!

(ps its not that i wouldnt want sex... i just don't feel right doing it to her and think i'd look at her differently in a worse way.)


maybe that's why.
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Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do more look like?
#16
If she didn't want to have sex, would it be weird to you, or would you just classify it as "she's not ready?"

It's not at all uncommon to feel that the pressure upon young men to always be sexual, always be up for sex, always looking for ways to have sex combined with feelings of just not being ready lead to the idea that something is wrong with them. Trust me, you're fine, more guys rush into sex before they're ready than you'd think. Go with your instincts, if it doesn't feel right, don't do it. You can always wait, and when the time comes, it does, it can't be rushed. Kudos to you for having the presence of mind to question yourself, rather than just going for it and hoping everything works out. (I know quite a few people who've gone with that mentality.)
When crying don't help
You can't compose yourself
It's best to compose a poem
An honest verse of longing
Or a simple song of hope...
#17
My friend felt like this with his last girlfriend. She was 'innocent' and he was 'experienced,' and he felt guilty being the one who made her 'experienced.'

Too much respect, mayhaps?
Were you and this girl good friends prior to dating, because that could have something to do with it.
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#19
You got respect and natural morales.Mind lending them to the world?
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#20
Um, it's this thing that some guys have, it's called respect. Despite what most guys think, girls aren't just vaginas on legs. They are people, and aren't there to just get "sexed up" 24/7. You're simply experiencing that respect for women. I commend you, not many guys have it. I'm personally waiting till marriage, but that's a whole nother can of worms.
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#21
Pillow Pants.
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#22
its ok i feel for ya. im the same way (but thats because i havent really had a gf )
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#23
sorta on the same boat.

I've been with this girl a week and she wants it but Im so meh about it because.. Wheres the challenge? its not as meaningful!
#24
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Dude, you've been alone in Dundee too long...that is NOT reffered to as "dating" ^^
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#28
well the thing is i think she wants it more than me. she's also "experienced" and i'm not (but she's not a slut she hasn't done it in over a year... it was just a bad phase in her life with some real douchebag). i don't wanna like... disappoint her, but i don't want this to ruin things between us. i dont know what to do. probably not do too much eh?
#30
Quote by Angry-Mares
Just means you're not ready.

I was like you before, I'd look at someone I like and couldn't possibly imagine doing anything more than hug / make out.

Then a couple of years passed and now I'd bang my girlfriend in a heartbeat (theoretically... single atm)


agreed
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#31
Not wanting sex isn't a bad thing.

Me and my girlfriend agreed not to, Usually it just Fucks Shit Up.

Though sometimes I get the urge, and its kinda hard to dispell it.
#33
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omg you just made my night.
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#34
Quote by Teh_Guitarer
so i've been goin out with this great girl for over 2 months and we haven't done much in the way of sex. we've felt each other up not too badly and that's about the extent of it. she talks dirty to me every once in a while and we've talked about it and we've agreed we'll do some stuff.... but i feel guilty doing that kind of stuff to her. even though she wants it. i think i'd look at her differently if i did much more... i'd think her more of a slut or something i'm not sure.... but i kinda think it wouldn't be very good for us. so anyone got any advice? WTF IS WRONG WITH ME?!

(ps its not that i wouldnt want sex... i just don't feel right doing it to her and think i'd look at her differently in a worse way.)



No no no no no.

Dude, you're the only person I've ever heard of that thinks it would be a bad idea to have sex. You think it would be bad because you would see her differently? Like, naked? Oh no, not that. Just do it.
There is no end to creation.
#35
Quote by Teh_Guitarer
well the thing is i think she wants it more than me. she's also "experienced" and i'm not (but she's not a slut she hasn't done it in over a year... it was just a bad phase in her life with some real douchebag). i don't wanna like... disappoint her, but i don't want this to ruin things between us. i dont know what to do. probably not do too much eh?


Don't let her pressure you, if she really cares for you, she won't think twice about giving you all the time you need.
When crying don't help
You can't compose yourself
It's best to compose a poem
An honest verse of longing
Or a simple song of hope...
#36
I think the only thing faulty, is you thinking that having sex with your girlfriend will make her a slut. There is no logical basis for that.

Also, for those calling him morally superior... that's ridiculous. Since when did denying to have sex with your girlfriend become the "moral" thing to do?

If you're not ready, you're not ready. And, if she dumps you because you're bad in bed.. she's not worth it anyway. It's obviously completely your choice, do whatever you're comfortable with. Don't let her force you into it either, you'll regret not being in control of things.

Just do what you're comfortable with, it's that simple. Talk to her about it, not UG.
BOLD.
#37
Quote by Twist of fate
You probably have more respect for her.


yeah, i think this means that you actually care about the girl. congrats. this is where real love starts....
...Nothing you've ever...
...Planned on ever turned out...
...The way you planned...


...You're still disappointing them...
#38
Quote by The Black Salts
No no no no no.

Dude, you're the only person I've ever heard of that thinks it would be a bad idea to have sex. You think it would be bad because you would see her differently? Like, naked? Oh no, not that. Just do it.

wrong!
i thought it would be wrong but i gave in anyways...and if ruined my relationship...it took over if you know what i mean...like i wanted it so bad for a while that eventually my gf got pissed off at me...if you decide to do it...then make sure both of you are ready...
#40
I was kind of the same way, I probably still would be if I actually got in a proper relationship. Looking back on my last girlfriend, I probably could've gotten away with a lot more than I did, especially considering we went out for 8th months.
If you could blow up the world with a flick of a switch,
Would you do it?

If you could make everybody poor just so you could be rich,
Would you do it?

With all your power,
What would you do?
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