#1
look in the mirror woman
shattered pieces short and tall
you wouldn't know that cuz you've
you've had it turned against the wall
so listen to what i'm telling you
as we tip a glass of wine or two
ambition is hard to find
when its hard to get out of bed

when its hard to get out of bed

i am no wiser than the fool
that i was before
but i have learned a few things
and i'm sure that i will learn some more
there is one promise i can keep
but its gonna make it very hard to sleep
it doesn't matter what i say
cuz it'll still be hard to get out of bed

its hard to get out of bed

my feet are full of bullet holes
i guess i should put down the gun
i'll be heading for the highway with my face up to the sky
and i will ask myself why...
#2
I'm going to be honest... I don't like it much. The rhyming is pretty basic and mixed up, and the meaning of the song isn't very clear. It has alot of potential, but right now it's not very good. Go to dictionary.com and change some vocab, use the thesaurus on there too. Good luck, hope it works out.
Your head slowly caves in from the compression
#3
I enjoyed reading this piece. For the most part it was pretty solid and the I liked the imagery used in the piece. It was able to paint a picture in my head. However, there were a few individual lines that need some changing. That "short and tall" thing in the second line doesn't sit right with me. It just seems to lack any punch. Maybe try "Raining shattered crystals". Also in the third line I would take out "cuz you've" and replace it with "since". In the second verse I suggest changing the second line. it seems too short. Perhaps "That came knocking on your door". Anyways, great job overall.

Crit mine please
Ghostown Photographs