#1
This is a song i wrote for my father..tell me what you think if you would like..


i haven't been sober for thirty-years
it seems like a coma shedding all these tears

Pre-Chorus
im living my life the only way
but as i grew life was more than day to day


Chorus
I am sober, and im losing all my strength
when you dont have it is when you dont think
i am sober, and i fall in from the storm
i pick my self up dont let it drag me down
cause i will be sober


it seems so hopeless waiting here
that one more time is my biggest fear
losing my place at my home
out on the street and im all alone


Pre-Chorus
im living my life the only way
but as i grew life was more than day to day


Bridge
lost in what we found
and blind from what we see
putting it back down
i call it destiny
finding myself shaken
from the fury of the storm
i craw from the bunker
finally out into the warm


Chorus
I am sober, and im losing all my strength
when you dont have it is when you dont think
i am sober, and i fall in from the storm
i pick my self up dont let it drag me down
cause i will be sober
#2
Nicely done. The flow is good, except for the chorus, try to make it shorter or rhyme better. Grammar, "i" to "I", simple stuff. I'm sure he'd like it.
Your head slowly caves in from the compression