#1
i got really bored so i just wrote this and think it sucks and isnt finished but dont want to completely give up on it. lol. crit4crit.


I am thinking.
Thinking way too hard.
About the worries.
That are way too far,
and reality
striking me at
100 mph speeds.

my heart racing through my chest,
my dreams becoming less and less
but the tears keep growing
the tears keep falling
dreams disappearing
my thoughts still racing
life on the line
this worth questioning
for this one
my life is spent living

and shes the one
the one driving me insane
and insanity is to blame
for liking this one, for thinking too much
#2
Not bad, it doesn't suck. It could use some work though. The meaning is very good, and the flow is alright, but not good. Most of the rhymes are too simple, try to spice up some vocab. I can see it going somewhere.
Your head slowly caves in from the compression