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#1
Hey guys I don't think this goes in the relationship thread. But here's my story I've been looking for job for like a month and I finally got an interview and it went great but here's the catch. They want me to work shifts till 11:30 - 12:00 at night which I don't mind. Now my girlfriend is upset because I barely see her as it is and I'd probably see her less. Now she's all upset and we're barely talking so on one hand I don't want the job and on the other I want some money. So UG here's my question what should I do?
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#4
If your girlfriend can't understand how important this job is to you, she doesn't desverse you. Assuming you're not a douchebag. I'll give you the benifit of the doubt.
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#5
Try see if you can work better hours or less hours
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#6
you will most likely break up sooner or later so i would take the job
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#8
Yeah, +1 on seeing if you can get better hours

But remember that what you do in life is for you and will stick with you forever, so if you make sacrifices from what you DO want for other people it is very very counterproductive and tends to not be worth it. Particularly if that other person is not even being understanding about the situation you are in. The only reason not to take that job, especially since you've been searching for a month, would be if the time was unreasonable for you. Your time is yours, not hers, and you can spend it as you see fit. It's not like you're never going to see her again, and it's not like you're saying you don't WANT to see her, so she shouldn't be offended.

I would take the job, when I got my first job I was so excited and I honestly learned a lot from it, responsibility and also it's nice to have a steady experience to reference on later applications/resumes. There was a lot I was questioning about family circumstances and social time but I am so glad I took it. I've been there for over a year and I too don't leave until 11.20-11.30 (so I get home just before midnight, usually). You'll figure it out.
#9
Well how much do you care about her? It sounds like she's missing you as it is, I'd say find another job. I would.
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#10
dude...keep the job and you'll most likely make good friends with some girls at your job whether their working with you or are customers
#11
take the job, screw the gf. A good gf would understand/encourage you

dont be a tool.
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#12
A tool would listen to your advice, in my opinion.

There's no point in being a relationship if you can never spend time with the other person. It's completely unreasonable to expect any person to say "oh, it's OK if you never have any time to spend with me." She either cares about you a lot or she's controlling. It seems to be more of the former since you're concerned about the outcome. Are you working because you "need" to or as a luxury? If you need to, then you could take this job and look for something else at the same time. If you're just doing it for some throw around cash, I'd look for something else.
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#13
hmm its funny how teenage girls dont want you to have a job, b/c they want you to spend TIME with them...then when they hit there 20s they say you NEED to have a job (so they can spend your MONEY)

take the job dude
#14
Quote by thera_x
screw your girlfriend if shes mad at you for working


agreed
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#15
Quote by Dirk Gently
A tool would listen to your advice, in my opinion.


Was that to me? Maybe this is why I'm single
#16
Simple. Take it, say you didnt take the job for her so you can have sex with her one more time then break up and get another GF.
#17
circumstances. all depends on

how much does the girl mean to you?
how much do you actually need the job?
how many days a week would you work those ****ty hours?
could you just find another job?
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#20
Quote by KickOutTheJamsX
circumstances. all depends on

how much does the girl mean to you?
how much do you actually need the job?
how many days a week would you work those ****ty hours?
could you just find another job?



She means alot.
I don't need it too much.
2 days a week one being a double shift.
Probably not I've applied every wheres and haven't got anything back.

Quote by SilentDeftone
Why can't you see her on the weekends? Are you working every day after school? Surely there is SOME time you have off!

-SD


If I'm not working she's doing something she's IB which is alot of work.
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#21
If you barely see your girlfriend as it is then she will probably be gone in a couple of weeks anyway. Your job, on the other hand, can provide valuable life experience and an income that can support your school and any other future ambitions.

Of course, there is something to be said for your girlfriend providing you with valuable life experience as well, but then you can say the same for losing your girlfriend over your job. Only you can decide if your girlfriend is worth enough to you to keep her over a job. The only real catch is that you won't know for sure until you look back on it several years later. As an adult (25), Id say that statistically the probability lies in the job doing more good for you in the immediate future than your girlfriend. Most teenage relationships only last a couple weeks and the longest maybe a year or two. There will be time for serious relationships later. Right now a job can help you with your education and work experience (one and the same really) which is far more valuable.
#22
Quote by rock_on986
She means alot.
I don't need it too much.
2 days a week one being a double shift.
Probably not I've applied every wheres and haven't got anything back.


If I'm not working she's doing something she's IB which is alot of work.
If your girlfriend is complaining over you working 2 days / week then she has issues. That would be a serious red flag for me. School and work trumps relationships until you get married and start a family. If she doesn't "get" that yet then you need to distance yourself from her.

Edit - BTW - you "need" any job you can get. Work experience, no matter how much or how little, is extremely important. It's more important than school. I can NOT count the number of times that a potential employer has asked about my work experience (pretty much every single interview I've ever done) but I can count the number of times an employer has asked about my education - maybe 2 interviews out of hundreds. The only girl who should ever be able to stand between you and a job is your wife or your daughter, and from the sounds of it you are far from "there".
Last edited by garett at Oct 13, 2007,
#23
Well, I don't know about your girlfriend's IB school. But I do IB and I have time to fit in homework, marching band, swimming, and taking up a new instrument in hopes of doing drum corps which will take up a lot of time as well.

I think you should make a larger effort to see her if you really care about her. IB doesn't take up that much time. And I'm sure there are plenty of times you can see eachother, you just haven't found them yet.

My girlfriend and I both have busy schedules, but we always manage to find time sometime during the week to see each other. There are 168 hours in a week, I'm sure you'll both find time.
#25
dood stay with ur gf and leave the job. the only reason shes complaining is cause she wants to see you more often. and would u rather be at home with ur gf, or trying to stay awake stocking shelves? unless the job might lead you somewhere, stay with the gf
#26
is this girlfriend the same type of girl who wants you to pay for everything when you go out?because if you quit your job you cant buy her wendy's value meal and if she's fat then you might need to think about getting a second job.
#27
Ah, I'm mostly in the same situation.

See my girlfriend saturday, tuesday afternoon. College wed-friday. Getting a job is certianly going to cut into that. I am definitely getting a job, it's a condition of me leaving school a year early...
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#28
The real question here is, can you have sex with your job? If not then your gf has a slight advantage.
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#30
How much is the pay?
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#31
you're gonna work two days a week, and you can't find time for her? am i missing something?
Grammar and spelling omitted as an exercise for the reader.
#32
Quote by Dirge Humani
With a job, you make money.
With a girl, you lose money.

Sounds obvious to me.


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#34
What does IB stand for? Irritating Biatch?

Two days a week is hardly a big deal. If she really cares about you then she'll rearrange her schedule to see you more, but it seems to me like you're in a similar situation that I was in with my ex: she expects you to drop everything when she's free, but refuses to ever give up anything she enjoys for you.
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#36
If you have to ask, take the job. After all, that means you're prepared to give her up for a good job. And therefore you clearly don't care about her enough for the relationship to be that important.
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#37
Quote by rock_on986
Hey guys I don't think this goes in the relationship thread. But here's my story I've been looking for job for like a month and I finally got an interview and it went great but here's the catch. They want me to work shifts till 11:30 - 12:00 at night which I don't mind. Now my girlfriend is upset because I barely see her as it is and I'd probably see her less. Now she's all upset and we're barely talking so on one hand I don't want the job and on the other I want some money. So UG here's my question what should I do?



Without the job you'll lose the girlfriend. Rmember, they're high maintenance.

Keep the job.
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#38
Quote by break-me-in
If you have to ask, take the job. After all, that means you're prepared to give her up for a good job. And therefore you clearly don't care about her enough for the relationship to be that important.


WHAT? If a work place despritely needs someone, and me/my girlfriend have to cover it, being the nice people we are, if we did plan to meet up and it got canceled because of it, we'd accept that.

That's what good couples do. Doesn't mean we don't love each other.
#39
Quote by Yakult
What does IB stand for? Irritating Biatch?

Two days a week is hardly a big deal. If she really cares about you then she'll rearrange her schedule to see you more, but it seems to me like you're in a similar situation that I was in with my ex: she expects you to drop everything when she's free, but refuses to ever give up anything she enjoys for you.



Heck, same with my current girlfriend.


I'd take the job.
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#40
Quote by Craigo
WHAT? If a work place despritely needs someone, and me/my girlfriend have to cover it, being the nice people we are, if we did plan to meet up and it got canceled because of it, we'd accept that.

That's what good couples do. Doesn't mean we don't love each other.


That's different. He's asking "if I have to choose one over the other?", meaning he would consider giving her up completely for a job, rather than cancelling plans with her one night.
I play by my own rules. And I have one rule; There are no rules... but if there are, they're there to be broken. Even this one.


Confused? Good.

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