#1
I've been thinking of revolutions,
Of battles lost and won,
but I feel the battle for my heart,
has only just begun.

On one side my girl,
Stunning and brill in every way.
But there's someone else there,
who seems like the light at the end of my day.

When i met you after school,
on that day shining and bright.
You kissed me on the cheek,
I was high as a kite.

I met you again,
in "our spot"
A special place.
Where our dreams come true.
I'm feeling the pain,
I don't wnat to choose,
I've got so much to lose
Hearts to break
Feelings to hurt
Love to destroy...

Now i have neither,
I couldn't make a choice.
My damned "goody-goody" heart
is scattered all over the floor.

Now when i think of revolution,
and of battles won and lost
I realise what they can do to you,
their extent,
and their cost...

#2
Loved the first stanza, simplistic without a forced rhyme.

The rest didn't impress me too much really.. until it got back to the lines u used at the start. I'd take out the "and" on the final line.

"stunning and brill"
"high as a kite"
"dreams come true"

I'd try and replace those if you can, they're just a little overdone, and they don't really meet the high quality of the rest of the piece.

It's well above average for this site though, you're a good writer.
#3
The link between wars for revolution, and wars within your heart is a good one. It would be nice to see similar imagery and metaphors within the rest of the piece.

As skagitup said, it sort of disintegrates between the first and last stanzas, both in flow and content-wise. The rhyming pattern becomes a bit scattered in the long fourth stanza, and the fifth has none at all, which rings a bit false for me.

The lines he suggested you change are some examples of where your word choice is a bit awry. Also:

shining and bright,
who seems like the light at the end of my day. (this is too long, I feel; unless there's some very deliberate rhythmic device here)

It's getting there, just needs some art, as opposed to just telling it as it is.