#1
There are four kinds of sex:

HOUSE SEX - When you are newly married and have sex all over the house in every room.

BEDROOM SEX - After you have been married for a while, you only have sex in the bedroom.

HALL SEX - After you've been married for many, many years you just pass each other in the hall and say "**** YOU"

COURTROOM SEX - When your wife and her lawyer **** you in the divorce court in front of many people for every penny you've got.
#2
Great...

I prefer goatse threads to this.
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#9
Quote by IcePh0enix
I thought this thread would be more like:

Sex
Anal
Oral
Crazy **** you can't even post on UG


You forgot ear sex. (Unless you don't watch Family Guy)
The Pit. The Movie.
#10
not really funny =/
<Raven> I got so baked last night
<Raven> that I WOKE UP high o_o
<Raven> Do you have any idea how euphoric that is?
<Raven> I felt like I was being born.
#11
Quote by CousticStrangla
Well i mean...


?

go on...
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#12
Quote by Spay
You forgot ear sex. (Unless you don't watch Family Guy)

Rofl I do, but the title only has 4. I could think of many different ways .
#13
This thread is.....a waste of space!!
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#15
Man, know your audience.

Telling a divorce joke to a bunch of 12 year olds isn't going to work...
#16
Quote by gen0doom
What about SELF SEX? And NO SEX????


...It's like you're describing my life
#18
Missle Silo Sex is the best.
My all gold grills give her cold chills
Said she gotta coke feel cuz I'm sooo trill.
#20
Quote by gen0doom
What about SELF SEX? And NO SEX????


or PUBLIC SEX/and or EAR SEX
Quote by bassboy 999
Cheers to you triple x maniac


Quote by snipelfritz
Wait, your dick is in a chick's ass, and you're complaining.

Its a sad, sad day.
#22
Quote by CousticStrangla
Damn, I forgot 99% of people here are 12.


Well to be perfectly fair, it wasn't the best of jokes...
#23
Heard these before, you forgot

SMURF SEX - When you first meet and have sex till you're blue in the face
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#24
Oh its funny, because he says sex, like ****ing, like being ****ed in the court! Its funny because he played on words! He funny! He funny!
Real men don't need sigs.
#27
Quote by Jackolas
What about "you must be getting no SEX to make a thread like this"?


I resent that! There are rock formations out there getting more sex than me and you don't see me making these threads now do you?
#28
This only makes me think of those stupid myspace bulletins.

Only actual 12 year olds would laugh at that, I think.
"Button my white shirt
Put on some old ragged shoes.
Facade or the truth?"
#29
does this thing need a thread of its own, and i read this somewhere before, still funny lol...that's a good reason not to get married, becasue marriage = taking the spark away from your relationship, also shooting the passion with a shotgun(cobain style {R.I.P.})


and C.C. deville, i love you and your avatars, yes i do
#30
[quote="'']BUT*SECKS!?




No. Butt..Secks had has his time, in the old days.

Useless thread tbh.