Poll: Get him back (or at least try), or lose him?
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View poll results: Get him back (or at least try), or lose him?
try to get him back in the band
12 23%
forget about him
41 77%
Voters: 53.
#1
Well the bassist in our band just told the guitarist on AIM yesterday that hes quitting because "its tearing us apart" Thats high school for ya... drama queen, much?

So, hes a really good friend and has been since 1st grade, so I'm wondering should we try to get him back in the band seeing as how this is one of his common mood swings, or give up?
He's been slowly going away from the music we've been usually playing and showing little interest in the songs we recommend, and hasn't been open for a practice or even following through with planning one. Please keep in mind hes a really good close friend, and I can't see us having the friendship we used to have after this...

So, can 'em? Keep 'em? Any advice would be appreciated.

EDIT: When I say forget him I mean as the bassist, not as a friend. The only reason I somewhat want to keep him is that hes such a close friend.
Last edited by lounge act at Oct 17, 2007,
#2
Dont have your best firends in a band, try being in a abnd with good mates and people you know well, but not best mates. If things go wrong, they go WRONG.
#4
Quote by Moggan13
Dont have your best firends in a band, try being in a abnd with good mates and people you know well, but not best mates. If things go wrong, they go WRONG.


definately...

find a new one, someone who is more interested in the well-being of the band...
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#6
Quote by lounge act
Well the bassist in our band just told the guitarist on AIM yesterday that hes quitting because "its tearing us apart" Thats high school for ya... drama queen, much?

So, hes a really good friend and has been since 1st grade, so I'm wondering should we try to get him back in the band seeing as how this is one of his common mood swings, or give up?
He's been slowly going away from the music we've been usually playing and showing little interest in the songs we recommend, and hasn't been open for a practice or even following through with planning one. Please keep in mind hes a really good close friend, and I can't see us having the friendship we used to have after this...

So, can 'em? Keep 'em? Any advice would be appreciated.



okay depends on how easily you get a replacement. if you dont go about things the right way your relationship could not recover..this happened with me and a friend who left the band and was too embarrassed to hang out after it.
#7
Quote by x_thurston_x
definately...

find a new one, someone who is more interested in the well-being of the band...

Yea, we pretty much had him learn bass, and he got really good really quick. A few weeks ago he said to the guitarist and me "Hey would you guys mind if I like did my own recordings and stuff?" We really saw this coming, and that was pretty much the final step.
#8
Quote by lounge act
He's been slowly going away from the music we've been usually playing and showing little interest in the songs we recommend

If he's not enjoying the music you guys are playing, then he's obviously not going to want to stay in the band. Just respect his taste in music and find a new bassist :/
#9
bands are like relationships....only more important.
You have to have a lot in common with the people in the band, and everythin has to fit or it wont work.
Me and my best friend argue about music all the time, hence why we are not in a band together. If we were the arguments would be more serious. Cos we're not, they are not, and we can still have a really good laugh together
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#10
find a girl

teach her bass

that way you get:

1. a bassist
2. laid
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#11
Quote by lounge act
Yea, we pretty much had him learn bass, and he got really good really quick. A few weeks ago he said to the guitarist and me "Hey would you guys mind if I like did my own recordings and stuff?" We really saw this coming, and that was pretty much the final step.


Hahah . . . reminds me of the old drummer joke. If he really wants to play then sooner or later he'll join back up . . . I wouldn't say wait awhile to search for a new bassist, cause that'll just hurt his feelings big time. What do I know though . . . never been in a true band.
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#12
I just quit my band for the same exact reason. I was in a band with three of my best friends and it was really hurting our friendship. We couldn't agree about anything to play, people would get left out of songs. It was pretty much a really ****ty atmosphere. Now I think my friendship with them will be much better because we aren't screaming at each other every two seconds.
#13
so because he doesn't want to play that kind of music your gonna be an ass about it? just find a new bassist
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#15
That's why you don't make business with the family. It can destroy your relationships.
If he's not showing interest or something, it's better to let him go, before your friendship gets screwed over because he missed a gig or screw the band.
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#16
i vote forget about him, but i don't think you should forget about him. He's your friend. But he doesn't necessarily have to be in your band to still be best friends. just respect his decision, find a new bassist. but remember that ur band isn't ur life, u still have friends outside ur band and u shouldn't forget about them.
#17
If he wants to leave (which from what you said, he does and has for a while) then ask him why but... there's no point in stopping ihm. And there's no point in ruining a friendship over it. It won't be his fault if your friendship suffers.
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#18
Quote by Darth_Qurashi
i vote forget about him, but i don't think you should forget about him. He's your friend. But he doesn't necessarily have to be in your band to still be best friends. just respect his decision, find a new bassist. but remember that ur band isn't ur life, u still have friends outside ur band and u shouldn't forget about them.

Well, I meant forget about him as the bassist, but not as a friend.
Quote by ChaoticVengence
so because he doesn't want to play that kind of music your gonna be an ass about it? just find a new bassist

And how am I being an ass? I haven't even said anything about this to him yet. I just found out a little while ago. Its just not the different musical tastes.
Last edited by lounge act at Oct 17, 2007,
#19
if our gfoing to form a band with your best friends make it a jsut for fun band, have a serious band with other people
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#21
Quote by lounge act
Yea, we pretty much had him learn bass, and he got really good really quick. A few weeks ago he said to the guitarist and me "Hey would you guys mind if I like did my own recordings and stuff?" We really saw this coming, and that was pretty much the final step.


The hell is wrong with that?
I'm assuming his own recordings, like his own stuff. Why would that be bad?
Just ask him what's wrong, and see if you can convince him to come back. If not, find a new bassist. And you shouldn't turn your back on him b/c of him leaving, he's still your friend.
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