Page 1 of 11
#1
www.urbandictionary.com

Type in your name and then post the funniest definition here!

Here's mine:

Nick:
To sleep with any girl that comes your way, regardless of looks...cause hey, you wanna f***, she's there, and you're drunk enough to do it.

guy 1: Did you take that random chick home with you last night?

guy 2: F*** yeah, I nicked her!
45 days without my precious UG...
CURSE YOU LOLWUT PEAR!!!

Quote by eggo_boi_15
Arnt the first few things anyone learns on a guitar is

1. Nirvana - smells like teen spirit
2. Prince - Smoke on the water
3. White stripes - seven nation army
#2
mathieu isn't defined yet.


Bastards
Trust me I'm a doctor

A doctor with a mustache
#3
phil



a "phil" is a Doritos' tortilla chip, circa 1988 in Southern California, that came about due to some guy named phil getting a part for a commercial advertising campaign for Doritos. His hair was stuck straight up in the commercial, you might remember him.

Dude, we like, Toootallly need some phil's to make spicy barbecue nachos.
Quote by Inimical
So he's sexually attracted to animal rights activists?

That's messed up.


Quote by DaddyTwoFoot
If Pokemon were real, I'd get me some sweet, sweet Jynx pussy.
#4
someone who is usually always irish with intreguing blue eyes. As with most irish people, he is almost always easier to figure out while heavily induced with alcohol. You're never sure if you want to date this person, or aviod them at all costs. Brian generally has no enemies, but at times is intensely disliked by his friends. He is great at making you feel big emotions, while using small words, and half ass'd glances.

That Brian is like great sex with your husbands best friend: highly addictive, and usually brings guilty feelings later.

Yay, my eyes are "intreguing".
#5
Sarah:
The middle of a Hamm sandwich.
Mmmm I'll slap some sarah in between those loaves for my hamm sandwich


I play piano and guitar.
Do you play piano?
Add me.
:]
#7
Funniest right here lol

2. kevin

v. The act of hip-thrusting. The body is positioned in such a manner in which the movement of the pelvic muscles is maximized whereas the movement of the rest of the body is minimized. The hips are then thrusted back and forth in rapid succession. See HardGay.

3. kevin

A Portuguese slang for penis

"Woah thats a big kevin"
#8
It is a person's name.

See, Zach? I wrote a definition. Stop saying "What does Zach mean?" now.
#9
i put something about the meggadeaths, megadeth, megadeath, and screaming abdabs or something on there.
sup?
#10
Noah
1. To have sex with an extremely hot woman, while fingering four other girls, 2 with each hand while "toe-ing" 2 more girls, one with each foot. Basically to Noah is to have sex with as many girls as possible, using every single body part capable of penetration.
2. The word to describe something greater than Chuck Norris
3. to dance like you're from the 1980's. Requires putting fingers behind back and shaking them like you're on coke. Also, driving vintage cars from the era which happen to travel in time at 88 mph.


Out of the first two, i don't know which one I like better.
#11
Nick:
To sleep with any girl that comes your way, regardless of looks...cause hey, you wanna fuck, she's there, and you're drunk enough to do it.

guy 1: Did you take that random chick home with you last night?

guy 2: Fuck yeah, I nicked her!

#12
Johnny

"Johnny" is a codeword used whenever you're doing something you're not supposed to be, and there are teachers/police around that your colleagues need to be informed of. Rather than shouting "Teacher!" or "the cops!", shout "Johnny", and the afore mentioned authorities will not be drawn to the scene, giving your friends enough time to resume lawfulness.

"We're gonna beat this poor kid up. Who's on Johnny watch?"
"I'll look out for Johnnies for ya."
"No, you're the kid we're gonna beat up."
"Oh. Damn."
#13
Ian (3rd's my favorite...though being derived from Indiana Jones rocks):
1. Code for a hot guy. Cannot be used in the case of females.
2. Scottish version of the English name John. The corruption stems from as late as 1989 from the Indiana Jones film "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade". In this film, Harrison Ford plays Indiana (Dr) Jones, who nearly plunges to his death when he steps on the letter "J" as the first letter of the word "Jehovah", when every good classical scholar knows that this word actually begins with an "I". Therefore, seeing as though I was actually born in 1979, for the first 10 years of my life I was known as "Jan", and it was only with the release of this film that my true name of "Ian" was made known to me through the self evident truths of Hollywood.
3. Conversational climax; a mind orgasm
#14


mark

To completly loose control of one's bowels and unload the contents of the anus on a surface, usually a drive way.


#15
Dan:
Abreviation for dumb ass n-word (don't like typing it). Apparently you use it to racially insult a black person but "don't want to get shot" so you use some lame abreviation.
Quote by Reverb X
I think you should touch your penis. It solves all problems.


Quote by JimmyPageda2nd
My penis is not huge.


EDIT: If anyone sigs that, I'll beat their ass.


Member of the Nobody Club:We Don't Matter Enough To Have Titles. PM gunther_sucks to join
#16
Haha, very true:

Scott

Usually a name given to the male species. Boys graced with this name are usually good looking, funny and extremely intelligent. Nicknames which are common are Scotty, Scottie or Scottee.

However if you unexpectantly have a girl pop out, Scott can also be transformed into a girls name in various ways e.g. Scottina, Scottette and Scott-anne.

Father: Here comes baby Scott!
Mother: Arrghh!!
Father: Errr...it's a girl!
Mother: Well, call her Scottina!
Survivor of the St. John's Lockdown
Quote by SG thrasher

The thread-starter is a legend.
Seriously, who thinks "Shit, i'm gonna die, BRB, Ima' tell UG."?

Quote by The_Paranoia

Congratz man, you are a true, American Hero.
Go Schneiderman!

Gun Facts: Educate Yourself
#17
Dimitry

"The coolest mother f*cker around, everyone wants to be him

Dimitry is da bomb, he is the coolest dude of them all."

No joke, thats what it said. That just made my day.
Gear:
Jackson Dinky DK2L
Epiphone LP Standard
Yamaha Acoustic
Bugera 1990 w/ Peavey 2x12 cab
#18
Steve

A thong that is visable above the trouser line of a girl. A useful word when spotting a thong or pointing one out without the girl knowing.

"Wow look at that steve over there!"
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
O O O O O O O O O O
#19
Here's mine.

Jordan:
verb- to have sexual intercourse with a sheep

"Wow; that sick bastard jordaned three sheep."


.....Lmfao that made me laugh so hard.


Heres the most awsome one



Jordan:
the hardest song in guitar hero 2.. Jordan by Buckethead. Inspired by Michael Jordan and only recorded with a solo for GH2 so far

"I heard that guy got a 5star on Jordan"
"not even ES942 can full combo Jordan"
Can some people send me some tabs of some songs with a pretty easy riff or power chord progression or something because I want to get better.
#20
AJAY:

any below-average height Indian child with an insatiable appetite for curry, who has a curious liking for American Football teams that lose, and a mouth that just won't shut up

1. i'm just about average height and am indeed Indian (see sig)
2. curry ftw!
3. GO RAIDERS!
4. i talk just a bit more than i need to

if the guy who wrote that wasn't from Mass, i would be cavity/web history searching my friends right now lol
#22
Cam

A wonderful, very attractive man.

and,

ridiculously good looking, an amazing man
Vala: 1987 Stratocaster Plus
Dargie: MM Stingray 5 HS Dargie Delight 1 of 15
Buttercream (for now): Stingray 4 HH ltd. 2005 Buttercream
Rose: Bongo 5 HH Fretless Candy Apple Red

Dargie Delight Aholic of the Bass Militia, PM Dinkydaisy to join
#23
eric :

The most amazing person in the entire universe. Everything about him is perfect! He's charming, handsome, intelligent, strong, romantic, funny...everything you want in a guy. It's impossible not to fall in love with him! Once you lay eyes on him, you will know from that very moment that you will never stop loving him.

did you see eric...damn that bitch is fine!
#24
Hugo.

1.a man who can hold his smoke, he can inhale a huge hit of weed with out the slightest cough afterward, a god of weed

i am so hugo its not even funny

2.A small suburban town located outside Minneapolis, where people get crunk everynight. And where the poon is in abundance. And people drive tractors everywhere.

" dude lets go to Hugo to get messed up"

3.You don't know what it is, you don't know where it came from, but you definetly don't want any on you.

You've got a bit of hugo on your shirt, Jim.
Gear
Gibson SG Standard with Emg Pick-ups
Marshall MG50DFX
Digitech Death Metal

I am the Eggman
#26
Eh...skips the first definition because it's about Ireland. xD

2. patrick

Failing to put enough marijuana in a bowl or joint because you want to save your stash.

Dude, the bowl's already cashed. Your habit of patricking really harshes my buzz -- you cheap-ass mother****er.
#27
Alan:

To touch a man. "Man Touching" is colloquially known as Alanning in Waterford, Ireland. The term is based on the nickname of a famous Man Toucher in the area. And was invented by an equilly famous hobo, who regularly Hamishs people.

Ferdia: Did you see Man Toucher earlier?
Hamish: Yeah he was Alaning a guy again.



.....wtf?
#30
1. Schnitzel

n.

A thin cutlet of veal, usually seasoned, that is dipped in batter and fried.


"Dude! You ate my ****ing schnitzel!"
45 days without my precious UG...
CURSE YOU LOLWUT PEAR!!!

Quote by eggo_boi_15
Arnt the first few things anyone learns on a guitar is

1. Nirvana - smells like teen spirit
2. Prince - Smoke on the water
3. White stripes - seven nation army
#31
1. adam 1245 up, 168 down

The first Man to ever get laid.

Adam and Eve had wild sex all night long.
#32
3. andrew 75 up, 102 down

Andrew (n):-

1) A type of authentic ghetto moustache
Lunatics on pogo sticks
Another southern fried freak on a crucifix
Hicks don't mix with politics
People on the street just kickin' to the licks
#33
Carly

Someone or something that gives you butterflys cause of their sexy apearance in which gives you urges.

"omfg.james bitchess.
"Strokes carlys hair" hah.
"Don't make me come down there!"


-God

[quote=""Professor McGonagall"
"]Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?


I'm a girl, by the way.
#34
lol

5. John
185 up, 131 down


A man with a very large penis, usually above 6 inches.

"Have you seen Waynes john?
"Sticking Feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken"--Tyler Durden

Cufk, TisH, Sips
#35
1. chris 556 up, 240 down

1. dude on family guy who is afraid of a monkey in his closet.

2. That dude who is always stealing your girlfriend, aka A Brad, or A Jeff... (common names for users)
#36
I'm going to have to go with this one.


Alex:

A woman with mannish features mainly in the facial hair department. They are often control freaks and are obsessed with boys who have no interest in them, yet they still try to seduce them. They are also known to be bitchy and try to pretend they are popular when really, they are the centre of all hilarious jokes.
#37
1. Brando
64 up, 20 down


Someone who will kick your ass with the flick of their wrist.

Be careful what you say, that dude is a ****in Brando
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2. brando
10 up, 13 down


To express disdain or disgust via inscrutably bizarre behavior.

Billy was so upset that there were no girls at the party he pulled a Brando - spoke in gibberish, yelled at the punch bowl and only ate the finger foods while dancing.
tags wigged flipped freaked spazzed jerked
#38
I'm Mario so besides all the definitions of the video game I have

-To stomp on someone/something with force.

Ex.
Did you see what Jerry did to Grandma?
Yeah he marioed her to death.
WHITE STRIPES

Quote by Placenta_07
I look at boobs and bums and stuff I get really horny and stuff.


PARTY OF SPECIAL THINGS TO DO
#39
1. Scott
Usually a name given to the male species. Boys graced with this name are usually good looking, funny and extremely intelligent. Nicknames which are common are Scotty, Scottie or Scottee.

However if you unexpectantly have a girl pop out, Scott can also be transformed into a girls name in various ways e.g. Scottina, Scottette and Scott-anne.

Father: Here comes baby Scott!
Mother: Arrghh!!
Father: Errr...it's a girl!
Mother: Well, call her Scottina
There ain't no moral to this story at all. Anything I tell you very well could be a lie.
#40
a term for a man who pretends to be a woman in order to pick up gay men online.

He went online and pretended to be a MICHAEL to pick up gay men. You should have seen the smile on his face.