Just so you get an idea, the guitar parts sounds like "Pennyroyal Tea"/"Something In the Way" by Nirvana...

"cancer coffin, on acid
better, now than, after
first degree, toxicity, is all we are
i gave, my heart, for sanity"

Am I on the way to a good song? 1st line's aobut the coffin of a diagnosed cancer patient, and how ridiculous it is, that the world is so blind to the problem. It's about the suffering in the world, and the second line refers to it's better to suffer here, than in the after life. The fourth line is kind of like, when I found my heart, I lost my mind... Oh yeah, and I'm only 13!
Sorry man, I don't post here, ever....
So.. please excuse my mistake.
Could someone give me a critique please?
just go to edit in your original post, delete it and repost with a proper title. this will get closed anyway.
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Quote by Moggan13
Serjem is like a Bishops testicals: Swollen
IIIIfb * KARKOLI * ytIIII(mostly rock... a little funky, a little hard just the way you want it )