#1
We all heard the story when we were little kids about a sweet blond who was hungry, so she got into the home of some bears to eat.
She was a good kid. Right? We all liked her and heard about her again and again.
Now think about it. If you are hungry. Would you get into someones house?
Not only that she got into their home and ate the bears dinner, but she also BROKE THEIR CHAIRS!
That's already private property violation, theft, and vandalism! Enough to put you behind the bars for some time.
But that's not enough. She also went to sleep in their beds!
So that also adds an illegal house occupation attempt!

I think that it's all a big conspiracy trying to teach the young kids that stealing is fine and recommendable.
So were we fed with tales about a sweet girl, or about a thief and vandal?
Discuss.
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Last edited by urik at Nov 1, 2007,
#2
An important detail they often leave out is that she is a prostitute.
Quote by denizenz
I'll logic you right in the thyroid.

Art & Lutherie
#3


who cares? still a good random ass thread !
Originally posted by J_Dizzle
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#6
natural human rights don't apply to bears. at best, you have animal cruelty.


My mind is going. I can feel it.
#7
Quote by daytripper75
the worst part is that they teach kids to go into a bears house.

A FUCKING BEAR!!!!!


Goldilocks made Papa, Mama, and Kiddy bear all orgasm, with just her bear hands.
Quote by denizenz
I'll logic you right in the thyroid.

Art & Lutherie
#9
Also rainbow fish was quite the communistic little story.

I mean seriously, taking away his scales so that everyone could have one. What the hell is that teaching kids?

"Oh no, don't be too talented or too different or too cool or too rich, IT MIGHT MAKE OTHER PEOPLE FEEL BAD!"
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#10
Quote by MTVget0FFtheAIR
natural human rights don't apply to bears. at best, you have animal cruelty.


But they were Anthropomorphic bears! Doesn't that give them extra rights?
How could they own a house if the laws didn't support them?
How could they have a bank account?

And in the case that they didn't, isn't that racism?
So it also teaches little kids to be racists and bad towards animals! GOOD WORK GOLDILOCKS!
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#11
Well, it also teaches them if you mess with bears you'll get mauled...important life lesson.
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#12
Quote by urik
But they were Anthropomorphic bears! Doesn't that give them extra rights?
How could they own a house if the laws didn't support them?
How could they have a bank account?

And in the case that they didn't, isn't that racism?
So it also teaches little kids to be racists and bad towards animals! GOOD WORK GOLDILOCKS!


I think it'd be specieism (sp?? )
Quote by Guitar0player
You're Thurstonsexual

Happily E-Married to En_zed
The public doesn't want new music; the main thing that it demands of a composer is that he be dead.
-- Arthur Honegger

Enjoy reading? Please crit my work .
#13
Quote by urik
But they were Anthropomorphic bears! Doesn't that give them extra rights?
How could they own a house if the laws didn't support them?
How could they have a bank account?

And in the case that they didn't, isn't that racism?
So it also teaches little kids to be racists and bad towards animals! GOOD WORK GOLDILOCKS!


All fables indirectly promote something that society thinks is "bad." Someone is bound to pick out some sort of fallacy in a fable, no matter how innocent it seems.
Quote by denizenz
I'll logic you right in the thyroid.

Art & Lutherie
#14
Quote by urik
But they were Anthropomorphic bears! Doesn't that give them extra rights?
How could they own a house if the laws didn't support them?
How could they have a bank account?

And in the case that they didn't, isn't that racism?
So it also teaches little kids to be racists and bad towards animals! GOOD WORK GOLDILOCKS!


lol, i guess i didn't look at it that way. thanks for opening my eyes to the madness that was Goldilocks.


My mind is going. I can feel it.
#15
Quote by darkstar2466
All fables indirectly promote something that society thinks is "bad." Someone is bound to pick out some sort of fallacy in a fable, no matter how innocent it seems.


Dude we're joking. Just follow the stream
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#16
Quote by urik
We all heard the story when we were little kids about a sweet blond who was hungry, so she got into the home of some bears to eat.
She was a good kid. Right? We all liked her and heard about her again and again.
Now think about it. If you are hungry. Would you get into someones house?
Not only that she got into their home and ate the bears dinner, but she also BROKE THEIR CHAIRS!
That's already private property violation, theft, and vandalism! Enough to put you behind the bars for some time.
But that's not enough. She also went to sleep in their beds!
So that also adds an illegal house occupation attempt!

I think that it's all a big conspiracy trying to teach the young kids that stealing is fine and recommendable.
So were we fed with tales about a sweet girl, or about a thief and vandal?
Discuss.


Are you high?
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#17
Quote by urik
Dude we're joking. Just follow the stream


How am I supposed to know? I thought you were being serious.
Quote by denizenz
I'll logic you right in the thyroid.

Art & Lutherie
#18
Quote by darkstar2466
How am I supposed to know? I thought you were being serious.


How could someone be serious :\
I mean, it's like the death star destruction theory thing.
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#19
Quote by urik
We all heard the story when we were little kids about a sweet blond who was hungry, so she got into the home of some bears to eat.
She was a good kid. Right? We all liked her and heard about her again and again.
Now think about it. If you are hungry. Would you get into someones house?
Not only that she got into their home and ate the bears dinner, but she also BROKE THEIR CHAIRS!
That's already private property violation, theft, and vandalism! Enough to put you behind the bars for some time.
But that's not enough. She also went to sleep in their beds!
So that also adds an illegal house occupation attempt!

I think that it's all a big conspiracy trying to teach the young kids that stealing is fine and recommendable.

So were we fed with tales about a sweet girl, or about a thief and vandal?
Discuss.

You make this sound so damned sinister, but it's NOT.

It's a lesson in reality!


1 - Goldilocks went into their house and ate their food.



Reality:
Hot girls take whatever the hell they want.



2 - She broke their chairs.



Reality:
Chicks break shit all the time. Get used to it.



3 - She got into their beds.



Reality:
If the bitch is gonna eat my food and break my shit,
she damned well better get in my bed!



Face it, this was a great story. But not the greatest.

Someday I'll tell you a much better story, about...


Little Red Riding Hood




and the Big, Bad Wolf

Meadows
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#20
so did that little goldilocks slut die in the end of the story or what?

usually im way too turned on by the end of it i just can't take it in..
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#21
Quote by The_Shredder
so did that little goldilocks slut die in the end of the story or what?

usually im way too turned on by the end of it i just can't take it in..


She met two lumberjacks in the forest...
Quote by denizenz
I'll logic you right in the thyroid.

Art & Lutherie
#22
Quote by darkstar2466
Goldilocks made Papa, Mama, and Kiddy bear all orgasm, with just her bear hands.



haha


It appears no one else noticed this.
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#23
Quote by JamieB
haha


It appears no one else noticed this.
Sorry dude. I was too busy writing teh epic post.

<_<

>_>

<_<
Meadows
Quote by Jackal58
I release my inner liberal every morning when I take a shit.
Quote by SK8RDUDE411
I wont be like those jerks who dedicate their beliefs to logic and reaosn.
#24
SYK that was awesome.

But I hated that story. First words out of my mouth after I heard it was 'How come the Goldilocks girls gets to break into peoples houses and I dont?"
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#25
Quote by darkstar2466
An important detail they often leave out is that she is a prostitute.


lmao!
funniest thing all day.