#1
My first post in a while, let me know what you think,

Matt
-----------------------------------------------------
Sacrifices? I'll tell you of Sacrifices
Shoving open ideas for the sake of love
Knowing full well, the repercussions
Would kill a man easily enough

Still you take me down there
Whisper words and feed me whatever
Pretend it's all ok, "I believe you"
I still believe you, never again, I promise
Till, next time...

The plans came to fruition
Now I am renascent
Through sacrifice and life
Pulled hard at hearts, lost souls

I played guitar and sang, her
heart jumped my soul and raped it
And after I found what I did tonight
I'm sleeping in tomorrow
Need Singing Advice?; Read the first page then ask questions.

Quote by punkman_123
Damn Auals, you're messed up. :P


Quote by ZanasCross
This just reminded me of the time that my brother in law texted his mom on the night after his wedding. All it said was "Consummated."
#2
Wow, I realy liked this. I cant even find anthing wrong with it! Really bitter and powerful. I would say change your title because unless I am very much mistaken, "disoriented" isnt a word. I think you mean "disorientated"
Othewise its excellent. This is a lousy crit so you dont have to crit mine but I'd be happy if you did.
#3
Disoriented is a word, but apart from that thanks Plus, the title seems slightly out of place from the piece anyway and that's on purpose so yeah, if it sounds like it's not a word then even better

I'll get to yours soon
Need Singing Advice?; Read the first page then ask questions.

Quote by punkman_123
Damn Auals, you're messed up. :P


Quote by ZanasCross
This just reminded me of the time that my brother in law texted his mom on the night after his wedding. All it said was "Consummated."
#4
I checked a dictionary, dude. Its not a word.

Disorient v.tr. = DISORIENTATE
Disorientate v.tr. 1. confuse (a person) as to his or her bearings. 2. confuse (a person). disorientation n
#5
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/disoriented

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/disoriented

having lost your bearings; confused as to time or place or personal identity;

Where disorientate is to confuse someone, disoriented is to be confused yourself, it is an adjective too, a nuance of the English language one might say

But whatever, the title is meant to confuse and it appears to have done that hahaha

thanks man
Need Singing Advice?; Read the first page then ask questions.

Quote by punkman_123
Damn Auals, you're messed up. :P


Quote by ZanasCross
This just reminded me of the time that my brother in law texted his mom on the night after his wedding. All it said was "Consummated."