#1
want to see if there are any reactions to this? Want to expand it a little and make it into a song ... C4C

I'm not that faint of heart kind,
but I won't stand for this anymore
If I have one more person tell me
that beauty lies in the eye of the beholder
I'm going to punch them in the face.
It ok to hear that one man's trash
is the treasue of anothers new face
but that too has faults of it's own
like how long do I stay and try
before I get moving to that some one else?
yeah I know that good things come
to those who can afford to wait it out
But doesn't that go against all odds?
the only thing that lies in the eye
of all the beholders is pain.
LISTEN:
A Myspace introduction to:

LEARN:
It's not always rainbows and butterflies,
It's compromise that moves us along. -- Maroon 5
#2
This is more like a spoken word poem than a song. It's rather good poem but I can't really imagine it being sung and flowing well in a song context. It hasn't really got any chorus or hooks either. The puncing in the face bit sounds a bit juvenille too.
Sorry if I'm sounding negitive but there is potential, I would reccmend imagine lyrics being sung when writing and maybe thinking about the background music a bit more.
P.s This is also the name of a song by Metallica.
#3
Quote by Acidshred
This is more like a spoken word poem than a song. It's rather good poem but I can't really imagine it being sung


yeah, I know it's in poem form now, I wanted to see if anyone thought it was a good idea to expand on and make into a song ... complete with chorus and all (oh my)
LISTEN:
A Myspace introduction to:

LEARN:
It's not always rainbows and butterflies,
It's compromise that moves us along. -- Maroon 5