#1
Here are lyrics to an extreme death metal song, at least somewhat inspired by the great Cryptopsy. Please critique and give feedback, thats exactly what I need right now.

Thursday

A dreadful entrenchment of metallic constriction
asphyxiates your every earthly orifice.
Yes, caress this invasion of sensation,
concede to your senses.
She dances callously around he of cloven hoof,
bleeding you with such care.
What do you wish?
Freedom from this infernal blade?
Let us ask of your assailent
what pity hath been bestowed on your name.
I do fancy Thursday,
her nimble incisions narrated by your shrieks.
I promised you Thursday would come -
she has just arrived.