#1
So I am the lead singer and lead guitar player in my band, along with a drummer, a bassist/vocalist, and a rhythm guitarist. We've been a band for around 8 months and we have a demo cd out and many original songs.

However, our rhythm guitar player has been holding us back. While me, the drummer, and the bass player have written materials for new original songs, the guitar player has missed 5-6 practices. I write out parts for him, and at the only practice he shows up to, he can't manage to play through the songs, and wants to work on his own song that he wants to sing lead vocals on. Everyone was pissed.

So now it's been agreed that we have to get rid of this guitar player because he is holding us back, he is un-reliable, he isn't that great at guitar, he doesn't have real gear (he uses one of my guitars), and he's trying to force us into playing his material when he hasn't even practiced with us for the past month or so.

The big dilemma is that we're all really close friends and we would like for him to still be friends with us and not talk badly about us. We've wanted to do away with him for a month or so, but none of us possess the courage. haha

Any ideas on how we should go about kicking him out?
#2
phone him and say if you dont show up then its not fair on the rest of us and we'll have to find someone to replace you, and if you really wanna stay in this band then prove you are committed
try it
x
#3
idk but dont do what metallica did to dave or in 20 years, u'r all gona be bitching bout yuor feeling on film
#4
Quote by rose_of_sharyn
phone him and say if you dont show up then its not fair on the rest of us and we'll have to find someone to replace you, and if you really wanna stay in this band then prove you are committed
try it
x


Agreed....
#5
Quote by skateguitar7654
Kill him.
*reported* Save this **** for the pit

If you feel you have to kick him out, do it in person. Don't be a dick about it, just tell him that it's not working out and you're going to continue without him. There's no way to do it without feeling bad or like a jerk. You just have to suck it up and do it. If you are going to bring in a new guitaist, make sure you have a couple in mind or one commited before you kick out your old one.


Hope I helped
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#6
Quote by element4433
*reported* Save this **** for the pit

If you feel you have to kick him out, do it in person. Don't be a dick about it, just tell him that it's not working out and you're going to continue without him. There's no way to do it without feeling bad or like a jerk. You just have to suck it up and do it. If you are going to bring in a new guitaist, make sure you have a couple in mind or one commited before you kick out your old one.


Hope I helped


agreed....
#7
If he hasn't showed up then just replace him, I can't believe you have kept him so long.
#8
Perhaps you could put it in terms of working together is straining the friendship, and you'd rather keep the friendship intact than let disagreements over music get in the way. Kinda like two people can be great friends but lousy roommates.
Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
-Dorothy Parker
#9
Quote by queenofthenight
Perhaps you could put it in terms of working together is straining the friendship, and you'd rather keep the friendship intact than let disagreements over music get in the way. Kinda like two people can be great friends but lousy roommates.

+1
Agreed. Kicking anyone out of a band is like ending a personal relationship. The person getting booted always feels a bit betrayed, even if they know full well they deserved it, it's just human nature.
Make sure the guy knows it's nothing personal. Just let him know that it's impossible to carry on with a member that doesn't turn up regularly to practice.
Don't mention any of the other **** like his playing ability or the fact that he want's to do his own songs, unless you say something encouraging to him like 'Hey, I really liked some of your ideas with that last song you wrote, if I were you right now, I'd put another band together of more like minded individuals and record some of your stuff'
That way, he's not going to hate you for the rest of your life and maybe cause **** down the line.
Believe me, in this game, you really don't want to be making any enemies.
Make sure you leave each other with a handshake.
#10
Quote by SlackerBabbath
+1
Agreed. Kicking anyone out of a band is like ending a personal relationship. The person getting booted always feels a bit betrayed, even if they know full well they deserved it, it's just human nature.
Make sure the guy knows it's nothing personal. Just let him know that it's impossible to carry on with a member that doesn't turn up regularly to practice.
Don't mention any of the other **** like his playing ability or the fact that he want's to do his own songs, unless you say something encouraging to him like 'Hey, I really liked some of your ideas with that last song you wrote, if I were you right now, I'd put another band together of more like minded individuals and record some of your stuff'
That way, he's not going to hate you for the rest of your life and maybe cause **** down the line.
Believe me, in this game, you really don't want to be making any enemies.
Make sure you leave each other with a handshake.


agreed...
#11
I agree, do it in person, amiably, and if it were me I'd let him know he needs to make sure and be at practice every time on time in future bands. No need to put down his ability or the issue over doing his songs, but friends or not he needs to know that missing practice will always get him kicked out of bands. I give it 3 strikes with feeble excuses and you're gone.

Believe me, in this game, you really don't want to be making any enemies.
Make sure you leave each other with a handshake.


Absolutely.

Unfortunately I've picked up a couple of enemies around here, but that mostly couldn't be helped. One was drunk and pushing for a fight, and almost got one, the other was a drunk jerk, sat in and basically took over - playing leads on top of my leads, almost knocked my mic stand over 3 times, way too loud, paid no attention to what the band wanted to do or who the band wanted to play the leads, and his girlfriend tried to steal one of my guitars when they finally left after nearly starting a fight. Both will probably follow me around for a while, but I didn't start either confrontation and tried to keep it from turning into one both times. The second one was started by the same guy who brought in the guitar player and theif girlfriend, mad because I didn't bring him any smoke and told him to leave me alone about it. I don't do it or bring it when I play and had been telling him that for a year or so. So he got mad and called in a drinking buddy who did everything he could to cause trouble and of course his girlfriend was all too glad to help. A few nights later he tried to start it with me himself. But you can't always deal with alcoholics without trouble sprouting up...

It'll come back at me later I'm sure, and if you cause hard feelings here it may be trouble later on, so try to do this without insults, arguments, put downs and all that.
Hmmm...I wonder what this button does...
#12
were going through the exact same thing in our band right now. we want to kick out our bass player because he is just plain horrible at bass and he writes terrible songs that dont even make musical sense. but hes one of my my best friends and im afraid hell get really mad at me. and everyone else in the band wants me to kick him out because im closest to him and i really dont want to do it.
#13
Ok lets slow down no need to kick him out just yet dude coulcn't you first warn him of wat hes doing wrong i f***n hate when people come out of nowhere and just kick people out