This is a melody that I wrote in a period of a couple days . Tell me what you think

The song is in my profile. It's called Spicy Slow Jam.

Feed my eyes, can you sew them shut?
Jesus christ, deny your maker
He who tries, will be wasted
Feed my eyes now youve sewn them shut
nice ^^
though more rockish, it still is awsome. catchy ^^
Fender American Telecaster (60th Anniversary)
Egnater Rebel 30 Head/Cab
Boss RC-20XL Loop Station
It sounds very influenced by Metallica, lead-wise (which I assume is about right, according to your profile picture and username ). It sounds really cool! I love the phrasing, but I find it's a little repetitive...
The bends are good, and there are hardly any bum notes as far as I can hear, so it's all good!
nice man i like it the one thing is that it has the exact same feel as orion(MOP but you know that), when it slows down and the bass comes in(at about 4:00). Obvisouly thats not a bad thing its just the first thing that came to my mind. I guess what im trying to say is that metallica is a major influence in some of my music too. rock on!