#1
Has anyone from The Pit worked as a mall Santa? I was wondering if this was a job that was open to the public. Like if I went to the mall, could I just say, "MAKE ME SANTA, BITCHES!"
Quote by KaMiKaZi90
"Mr. Owl? How many strokes does it take to make my little man explode?"
"Lets find out! One! Two! Three!"
*Crunch*
""
#3
No but my friend was an elf.

Pink overalls FTW
we crapped on him for AGES for that.
Not Enough AssHatery
#4
What do you mean mall Santa Claus?

You want to be Santa? Pfft.

>_>

<_<

So last year at the mall that wasn't actually Santa?
fuck
#5
Quote by DBS_KICKS_ASS
pedophile

Only on my own time. Never at work.
Quote by KaMiKaZi90
"Mr. Owl? How many strokes does it take to make my little man explode?"
"Lets find out! One! Two! Three!"
*Crunch*
""
#7
You could be like the one from A Christmas Story.

"HO HO HOOO!"
There's only one girl in the world for you
and she probably lives in Tahiti.
#8
Quote by MySweetFracture
No but my friend was an elf.

Pink overalls FTW
we crapped on him for AGES for that.

Inquire as to how your friend got this job
cause i wanna be a hardcore elf. and get fired on my first day.
Quote by KaMiKaZi90
"Mr. Owl? How many strokes does it take to make my little man explode?"
"Lets find out! One! Two! Three!"
*Crunch*
""
#9
my dad was a mall santa when he was 20 to make some extra money. he said the worst part was kids pissing on his lap.
Quote by Broadsword
I posted this in the last one, but yeah, some old dude in a McDonalds in Alabama called me an aardvark.


#10
Quote by K-Lizzle
You could be like the one from A Christmas Story.

"HO HO HOOO!"


Don't forget the boot tap to the forehead!
#11
Quote by K-Lizzle
You could be like the one from A Christmas Story.

"HO HO HOOO!"

Speaking of the Christmas Story, wouldn't it be awesome if they made a sequel? Like, when he was a grown up, in his twenties, during Christmas time. I've written a script that would be the ultimate irony..

Little Ralphie, who had always wanted a BB gun, grew up to be a dirty smelly hippie. He hated guns now.. He was all about peace, love, and and destroying all weaponry. But one day.. He was drafted into Vietnam.

And then he goes into Vietnam, and on Christmas day.. He decides he can't handle all the violence, and never wants to see his gun again. So he commits suicide, and shoots himself in the eyeball.

MAN, that would be a Christmas Special.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#12
Sequels sux.

But that one might be legit.
There's only one girl in the world for you
and she probably lives in Tahiti.
#13
Quote by K-Lizzle
Sequels sux.

But that one might be legit.

That one is brilliant.
Quote by vintage x metal
I love you =] I can't say I was very fond of you when we first started talking because you trolled the hell out of my threads, but after talking to you here I've grown very attached to you.

Yeah, write to my fanclub about it, honey.
#14
Quote by Prove_i_Did_It
Inquire as to how your friend got this job
cause i wanna be a hardcore elf. and get fired on my first day.



Step one: Go to mall office
Step two: Ask to be an elf
Step three: Don pink outfit and fairy shoes
Step Four: B1tch slap whinny kids
Step Five:??????
Step Six: Profit!!!!
Not Enough AssHatery
#15
Quote by MySweetFracture
Step one: Go to mall office
Step two: Ask to be an elf
Step three: Don pink outfit and fairy shoes
Step Four: B1tch slap whinny kids
Step Five:??????
Step Six: Profit!!!!


I fail to see the missing step. There's quite a racket to be had in whiny kid bitchslappery.

~wood~:stickpoke
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#16
Quote by woodenbandman
I fail to see the missing step. There's quite a racket to be had in whiny kid bitchslappery.

~wood~:stickpoke



You only use the missing step if slapping kids fails. AND DONT YOU DARE FAIL
Not Enough AssHatery
#17
Quote by Jack Off Jill
Speaking of the Christmas Story, wouldn't it be awesome if they made a sequel? Like, when he was a grown up, in his twenties, during Christmas time. I've written a script that would be the ultimate irony..

Little Ralphie, who had always wanted a BB gun, grew up to be a dirty smelly hippie. He hated guns now.. He was all about peace, love, and and destroying all weaponry. But one day.. He was drafted into Vietnam.

And then he goes into Vietnam, and on Christmas day.. He decides he can't handle all the violence, and never wants to see his gun again. So he commits suicide, and shoots himself in the eyeball.

MAN, that would be a Christmas Special.


You should really seek COUNSELING!

...SERIOUSLY GET HELP
#18
You have to be addicted to meth
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

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