#1
This is the first song ive written and right now we are only an acoustic band with 2 guitars. I hope you enjoy our song Please crit! (i will return the favor)

www.myspace.com/thesecondchancenj

'67 Gibson SG Standard
MXR Phase 90 | Ibanez Tubescreamer TS9 | Vox V847A Wah-Wah
'65 Fender Bassman
#2
too cliche
When the sun falls the moon rises...

My attempt at art lasted for an instant and then faded like a candle without oil...

When i get around to making more candles hopefully my art will return in a perfect form that all can appreciate.
#3
Quote by godofthemoon
too cliche


how so? please be more descriptive.

'67 Gibson SG Standard
MXR Phase 90 | Ibanez Tubescreamer TS9 | Vox V847A Wah-Wah
'65 Fender Bassman
#4
Quote by AndrewDulina
how so? please be more descriptive.


Are you kidding me.. I hear a guy strumming chords really fast and singing about a woman in ways that i've heard thousands of times before.. reminds me of some pop band out there which i cant name at the second..

In my opinion this type of music is boring because it just follows the textbook style.. the same could be said for any genere of music that is just too textbook.. I dont mind the lyrics but rythmically it needs to be changed and tweaked that up to you
When the sun falls the moon rises...

My attempt at art lasted for an instant and then faded like a candle without oil...

When i get around to making more candles hopefully my art will return in a perfect form that all can appreciate.
#5
Thanks for the input. I dident mean that your opinion dident matter i was just asking for something more in depth so i can see what other people think is wrong.

Anyone else? Was my voice on pitch?

'67 Gibson SG Standard
MXR Phase 90 | Ibanez Tubescreamer TS9 | Vox V847A Wah-Wah
'65 Fender Bassman
#6
the chords were nice. the vocals sound a bit like they have a bit too much eq on them. the vocals are good though, nice job with that. the acoustic guitar have some timing issues, but they're minor. the lyrics were very cliche. not that that's too terrible, but they do seem to be a bit much. you were on pitch.

crit mine? https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=730948
Too cool for a signature.
#7
Thanks for the crit!

'67 Gibson SG Standard
MXR Phase 90 | Ibanez Tubescreamer TS9 | Vox V847A Wah-Wah
'65 Fender Bassman
#9
Thanks!

'67 Gibson SG Standard
MXR Phase 90 | Ibanez Tubescreamer TS9 | Vox V847A Wah-Wah
'65 Fender Bassman
#10
definitely cliche, but its by far not bad. working on the note-transitions of your voice a little. the guitar seems pretty good. try writing a little more original though, sounds just like ALOT of bands.