Hi guys, before I start, just wanted to let you know I am new here. UG looks like a great place for tabs with a cool bunch of guys.

Anyways, I'm 19, and there is a 9 year old who I love to death, and would love to have sex with her. However, I don't know how to go about doing it...I don't really want to get a 9 year old drunk or anything, and it doesn't seem like she wants any...

Help please, and thanks
This isn't something you joke about. Get your sick ass out of the ****ing pit.
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This isn't something you joke about. Get your sick ass out of the ****ing pit.

Who said I was joking?

And I don't want to get her on drugs...
4chan has all the answers not UG

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Lol @ people taking this thread seriously. He's obviously an alt...
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Whats with the sudden influx of pedo's here?
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Thanks for the advice. I'm going to put it, along with your other advice, into a book, the pages of which I will then use to wipe my ass.