#1
Based on the painting of the same name by Edward Hopper. First time I've tried something like this.

I have never been the person who enjoys noise
Never been part of the yelling crowd in the street
I prefer to sit in the corner of an empty room
And try my hardest to gather my thoughts
They seem to roam a lot, so I am forced
To buy a drink, to lure them back
With the promise of refreshment
And then to eliminate them
In the extermination camp that is
An alcohol fuelled mind

Occasionally though, there will be others
In the room with me, who will talk
About their plans and their future
I can learn so much about them
That it helps to forget about myself
#2
I have never been the person who enjoys noise
I get the jist of what you want to say here, but I feel this sounds conversational rather than poetic. "The person" is very impersonal, "enjoys noise" sounds kinda nice but is a bit of a tongue full at the end of a line, perhaps phrase it like...

I have never been a person to enjoy noise

This way of phrasing sounds like he is talking in 3rd person, which relates back to the last stanza and him forgetting about himself. It's just a suggestion though.


Never been part of the yelling crowd in the street
Again 'the' just doesn't sit right with me, use 'a' imo. It gives the character more depth as to his background which in a short piece is essential.
I prefer to sit in the corner of an empty room
And try my hardest to gather my thoughts
This reads like poetry, arghh it is. gimme punctuation you ass.
They seem to roam a lot, so I am forced
Personally I am not sure but I'd like to see then end half of this line on a new line with the beginning of the next...

They seem to roam a lot,
so I am forced to buy a drink,
to lure them back


With the promise of refreshment
And then to eliminate them
In the extermination camp that is
An alcohol fueled mind

I hated extermination camp, I know the painting and it took it way out of context for me, the connotations of extermination camps are huge. I realise what it is referring to but the image is too strong for what is quite a simplistic painting in terms of detail. 'fuelled' is one 'l'.

Occasionally though, there will be others
In the room with me, who will talk
About their plans and their future
I can learn so much about them
That it helps to forget about myself

Beautiful ending and a beautiful interpretation imo, it does bring the picture to life which is the goal. The ideas are simple and clear and while the depth to the character is shallow it is enough to feel empathy for him. Perhaps though that is because I know the painting.

peACE

If you get time I have a short story up - One in a Million Dead.
Filth, pure filth... That's what you are.