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#2
OMG!
Thats so......*cries*.....eww makes you feel funny between the legs huh!

She pulled off his left testicle and tried to swallow it, before spitting it out. A friend handed it back to Mr Jones saying: "That's yours."


wow
#3
Kinda kinky.

She pulled off his left testicle and tried to swallow it, before spitting it out. A friend handed it back to Mr Jones saying: "That's yours."


Life is underrated.


Quote by Mad Marius
That's like saying you got cancer that comes with AIDS.
#8
Quote by brandon369852
It's happened to the best of us.


Amen.




If ANYONE yanked off one of my jewels, I would give em' a falcon punch to the jaw.

Woman or no woman, that's not right.
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.


-Jimi Hendrix-

Quote by CodySG
You know you're in the drug thread when you see pictures of squash and "tuna nigga!" when you click the page.
#9
Quote by brandon369852
It's happened to the best of us.


ALWAYS

WANNA BE WITH YOU,
MAKE BELIEV
E WITH YOU,
AND L
IVE IN HARMONY, HARMONY,



OH, LOOVE!
#10
I guess he's now merely half the man he used to be, eh?
Quote by Ichikurosaki
sloth is hacking away feebly at the grass because he is a sloth but he was trying so hard ;_; hes all "penguin im HERE i am here to help you penguin"
#11
Quote by Demon Wolf
I guess he's now merely half the man he used to be, eh?



ha
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#12
Quote by dudetheman
Amen.




If ANYONE yanked off one of my jewels, I would give em' a falcon punch to the jaw.

Woman or no woman, that's not right.



Rofl, if they want equal rights, then they can take a falcon punch to the crotch.
Quote by Senor Kristian
Viking fact no. 1: Viking helmets did not have horn.
Viking fact no. 2: Vikings tobogganed on their shields into battle.
Viking fact no. 3: Vikings drank mead.
Viking fact no. 4: One of your ancestors are likely to have been raped by a viking.
#13
Quote by dudetheman
If ANYONE yanked off one of my jewels, I would give em' a falcon punch to the jaw.


If anyone yanked off one if my jewels, I'd probably grab myself and scream for a right few days. Vengeance can wait, discombobulated nuts cannot.
Life is underrated.


Quote by Mad Marius
That's like saying you got cancer that comes with AIDS.
#14
WOMAN JAILED FOR TESTICLE ATTACK!


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#16
wow.Just adds more proof to my theory that all Amandas are indeed insane.
Rainbow
(I'm not gay)
#17
I got hard.

Anyway, note how we're all LAUGHING at this; yet when I posted that vid of a guy punching a girl in the vag, everyone acted like I was some kind of scum. I mean really, which is worse?

I hate to say it, but... I told you so.
#20
I'd stick my hand up her cooch and rip an ovary out. Be like "Revenge, skank".
BRIGHT LIGHTS PUT ME IN A TRANCE.
but it aint house music that makes me want to dance.
#21
Doctors were unable to re-attach the organ.


That sucks!

I wonder if they'll give him a prosthetic testicle, just so he'll look normal down south....


I know I would want one if it happened to me (and it very well could).
Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.


-Jimi Hendrix-

Quote by CodySG
You know you're in the drug thread when you see pictures of squash and "tuna nigga!" when you click the page.
#23
This is insanely old.
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#24
i wanna meet the guy who handed the poor guy his testicle back "here, this is yours"

who does that?
How do I change my sig?
#25
Actually...I Think Paul Mccartney forsaw this and wrote about it...


Suddenly,
I'm not half the man I used to be,
There's a shadow hanging over me,
Oh, yesterday came suddenly.

#26
"I am in no way a violent person."

riiiiiiiight...
This is my signature. There are many like it but this one is MINE.
#27
this news is actually quite old (llok at date at top of page) but makes me lol every time!
Quote by bearded_monkey
Oh man thats amazing, you win midi pure. I don't care whether it's a competition or not


Quote by halvies


could have been 3 's but there wasn't nearly enough exclamation marks to emphasize the anger/disbelief

oh yeah
#28
very old news.
Quote by LedZepKicksAzz
You are simply the greatest person ever to walk this great planet.
#30
you think that is bad?


BBC:
ESTES PARK, Co - In what paramedics called a ‘freak accident', tourist Ben Miller lost his penis in a bear trap at an Estes Park souvenir shop. Miller, a 39 year old draftsman from Orlando, Florida, and his family were visiting the Big Thompson River Gift Shop Thursday afternoon when the mishap occurred.

Martha Miller, wife of Ben Miller, told reporters that Ben was using the restroom at the time of the accident. The entire shop, including the restrooms, is littered with authentic items of the Old West. Rifles, washtubs, animal skins and even bear traps are hanging on every wall.

Shop owner, Ted Larson, explained, "I hung that old bear trap next to the urinal in the men's restroom. It was kind of a joke. Lord, that thing is at least a hundred years old and the hinges are rusted solid." Larson said that he was convinced that the trap wouldn't close. "I sprayed it with WD-40 and stomped on the release, and it still wouldn't close!" said Larson.

Paramedics were unclear as to how Miller's penis actually got close enough to the bear trap or what triggered it. "The trap was attached to the wall approximately 18 inches from the urinal, so it seems unlikely that anyone could accidentally injure themselves while urinating," stated Jared Taylor of Estes Park EMS. "We arrived within minutes of the accident. As with any dismemberment, we attempted to recover the severed member so that it can hopefully be reattached. Unfortunately, it appears that Mr. Miller's penis fell through a hole in the floorboards."

One of the paramedics spent almost an hour crawling around under the old building with a flashlight, but could not locate Miller's member. Police and paramedics speculate that the severed penis was eaten or carried off by an animal.

Miller was taken by ambulance to Whitewater Medical Center where he spent over 2 hours in surgery. Although he is expected to recover, doctors could do little in the way of reconstruction. Doctors suggested that Miller and his wife seek a qualified counselor to help them through this traumatic period upon returning to Orlando.

"It's too early to tell," was the response given by Martha Miller when asked if she intended to sue.

Ted Larson, bearing flowers, visited the Miller's at the hospital and offered his sympathies. "It's a tragedy," Ted told reporters. "But what I can't figure out is how he got his thing way over there in the trap. And what's more, I can't figure out how he got the blamed thing to snap shut. I just know they're going to sue me and take everything I've got. People always got to be poking things where they don't belong."

Larson offered the bear trap to the Millers to keep as a souvenir. They declined.
#31
"Larson offered the bear trap to the Millers to keep as a souvenir. They declined. "

Is it a bad thing if one of your testicles is larger then the other two?
#32
She ruined his life and got off with 2 & 1/2 years????


????

Metal Forum Popular Vote Winner!!!

Quote by webbtje
Quote by dead-fish
And you're obviously here because you fancy Phill.
Phill is a very attractive guy...

"I'm so tempted to sig that, Phill" - Sig it then

Unless otherwise stated, assume everything I say is in my opinion.
#33
"I am in no way a violent person."

- Amanda Monti


rly?
- Treat people the way you would like to be treated.
- Don't do to others what you wouldn't like others to do to you.
- Live and let live.
- Always tell the truth.
- If someone looks at you, just give them a nice smile they won't soon forget
#35
My balls hurt now
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#37
That's extremely old. Notice the date. People on here already have a sig of that one quote.
Quote by Sonicxlover
Kensai, I think I'll get a flamboyant sig.

Quote by Sonicxlover
Kensai, I think I'll get a flamboyant sig.

Quote by Sonicxlover
Kensai, I think I'll get a flamboyant sig.


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#38
This thread is full of so much fail and win. The thread itself is win, the stories are winning fails.

I love you guys.
Life is underrated.


Quote by Mad Marius
That's like saying you got cancer that comes with AIDS.
#39
wow...this bitch has some problems
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#40
Mr jones and me, tell eachother fairytales, and we stare at the beautiful women. shes lookin at you, ahh no no shes lookin at me.


anyone else think of this song while reading that?
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