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#1
My friend from another school told me today that in his phys ed class the teacher was describing semen for a bit. The teacher said something like it had a milky texture and it tasted sweet, and then one of the girls in the class raised her hand and said, "I always found that it tasted salty." And the teacher replied very seriously, "Well it's the tip of your tongue that detects sweet tastes, not the back of your throat."

Has anyone here been seriously burned by one of your teachers? Or know anyone who has? Discuss.
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#4
That's about the twelfth time someone's posted that story, claiming it was real. Go jack off a pig and get the **** out of here.
#5
wow...that must have been a fun day...
We sailed through endless skies...

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#6
Quote by Raziel2p
bash.org much?


agreed
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Discrepancy: While at 110 KIAS and 35 deg AOB with full right pedal, trims would not keep helicopter in correct Outer roll loop.

Corrective action:
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#7
nope. But one time my social studies teacher backhanded a student. B1tch slap style. They were both guys too, which made it even more epic.
Not Enough AssHatery
#8
my latin teacher mimicks you if youre annoying him

hes immature like that becasue he just got out of college
#10
Quote by iimjpii
Go jack off a pig and get the **** out of here.


you my friend have been sigged.
the game
#12
One of my teachers said that I was going to get beat up someday...
Did you know the odds of a Vault-Tec shelter failing are 1,763,497 to 1?

So imagine life in a Vault-Tec Vault. Not just a future.
A brighter future... underground.

Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish for a nuclear winter.
#13
My Physics teacher is the MAN.

Learning about forces and how to abbreviate them, he was explaining how you can change F-app(lied) to suit the problem. He used one of his baseball players as the example.

"If Capone is pushing a box, you can call it 'F-Capone'. If it's his mother, you can say 'F-Capone's mother.'"

Not to mention we play baseball in his class between periods with meter sticks and a tape ball.
Life is underrated.


Quote by Mad Marius
That's like saying you got cancer that comes with AIDS.
#14
Is this story seriously from somewhere else? I thought it was too epic to be true..
GEAR:
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#15
Quote by Timothym
I asked my teacher what ATP was.

He said "where Indians live"


LOL
#17
My math teacher once asked me why I was at class if I wasn't paying attention and I might as well go home. Unfortunately, he was just kidding, and I ended up getting ISS for skipping
#18
Not a teacher
a freaking guidance counselor
I was ignoring her, turned around talking to this girl because the counselors a dumb slut
And then I heard her say, "Ladies, turn around please."
(I have really, really long hair)
So I turned around, pissed at this point
And eeeeeeverybody laughs
But the worst part was...instead of "oh sorry," I got "Hahah, honest mistake."
=[
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#19
I think it's disturbing enough that they were talking about the taste of semen...
"There are millions of people in the world, and none of those people are an extra. They're all leads in their own stories."
<//////>~
#20
^ Indeed.
■■■
'member The Pit of 10'? oH, I 'member!


╚═ ▼▲▼▲▼═╝
#21
My English teacher told this kid to just drop out of school or go to juvie and lose his anal virginity.
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#22
Quote by Timothym
I asked my teacher what ATP was.

He said "where Indians live"



lol
Soon you will sit on the bench
of those who deny I have my soul
You sell a dream you create
Condemned by what you condemned before
Smooth are the words you sing down and high
Underground is your joy your laws
#23
that story is so over used, dude.

nice try though.
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#25
Old copypasta is old.
My history teacher always disses me for sleeping. It's hilarious, because half the time, only I actually notice.
If you could blow up the world with a flick of a switch,
Would you do it?

If you could make everybody poor just so you could be rich,
Would you do it?

With all your power,
What would you do?
#26
My art teacher burned this one kid pretty bad. This kid had gotten caught messing around with his girlfriend on the bus one day, and like a week later while discussing a class field trip, the art teacher said "I'd like for us to be able to take a bus, but SOME OF US can't handle being on a bus!" He looked right at the kid when he said it to, and then he laughed at him. Everyone in the class was in shock that he even said it.
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#27
My marketing teacher said that our athletics department should be called St Jude's Athletics, because St. Jude is the patron saint of lost causes...
#28
Teacher: These problems are long and hard
Kid: That's what she said!
Teacher: That's what you wish she said.

I was there and it was awesome.
Quote by Jminnich500
yea last week me and my freind kyle were in the bathroom at school and this kid was takin a **** so we decided to make a piss arch over the stall and onto his face...it was priceless
#29
Quote by iimjpii
That's about the twelfth time someone's posted that story, claiming it was real. Go jack off a pig and get the **** out of here.


He'd probably jack you off if this wasn't the internet but most people aren't so up front with what they want maybe you should approach him with coffee first then move from there.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#30
Quote by Opus Pocus
Teacher: These problems are long and hard
Kid: That's what she said!
Teacher: That's what you wish she said.

I was there and it was awesome.


#31
Music Theory:

A kid has fallen asleep laying on the floor (it's a SERIOUSLY laid-back class)

Mr.E: It also states that your parts...(sees the kid asleep)...someone get the gong.

(we wheel a massive gong to his head, give it a ridiculous strike)

Guy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (hilarious scramble to get up)

Mr.E: Ladies and gentleman, Requiem for a Dream!
#32
My Local Area Studies teacher told this kid he was a eunuch.
If morning's a bitch with open arms, night's a girl who's gone too far.

OMGWTFBBQ
#33
Quote by 5/4
Music Theory:

A kid has fallen asleep laying on the floor (it's a SERIOUSLY laid-back class)

Mr.E: It also states that your parts...(sees the kid asleep)...someone get the gong.

(we wheel a massive gong to his head, give it a ridiculous strike)

Guy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (hilarious scramble to get up)

Mr.E: Ladies and gentleman, Requiem for a Dream!

Epic!

My World History/Geography teacher makes fun of people every day and it's only the people he knows won't catch it......An example

Girl: "Who was in Canada first?"
Me: "...Spain"
Mr. P: "Yes!, It was Spain then Portugal...Wait, it was Purtugal first then Luxenburg....Archduke Franz Ferdinand was assassinated in Canada!"

One other guy and I are the only people who laugh at the stupid people because they say the dumbest stuff, especially when he just gets done explaining it......Another girl thought Rome invented the wheel, asked if Caesar's Palace was named after Julius Caesar and didn't know what a submarine was used for....This girl is in 10th grade mind you....
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brot pls
#34
This wasn't to me but I heard about it in class. This kid has really rosy cheeks and some other kids were messing weith him about it. Well the teacher was reading a magazine just looks over for a second and goes "hmmm....well that is a sign of a healthy baby." and she goes on reading.
Due what you want as long as you vote Due!
#35
My friend was giving me a piggy-back ride down the hallway (We're both guys, we were trying to get a laugh) and we passed by our Guidance-Counselor who regularly helps kids with self-esteem issues. She sees me, who's a little chubby, on top of my friends back (also a little chubby) and says

"You really shouldn't give him a piggy-back ride, you might hurt your back"

and walks away. The freakin' GUIDANCE COUNSELOR made a fat joke.
Quote by top shelf

I couldn't do it [masturbate] with the cast on however. That's when I dug out my baby sister's stuffed animals and went to town

Quote by Tubyboulin
Is it bad that I imagined you saying that in a really sexy voice?
#36
My Geometry teacher told the entire class I was dumb, and that if anyone talked to me I would 'drag them down with me'. Needless to say, I was happy to recieve a compliment like that .
#37
Freshman year I was in an Algebra class, and the teacher was incredibly cool. We could mess around all we wanted, and everything. He messed around quite a bit too. One time he pulled his knife on me, and pretending to stab me with the handle. I, for some reason, thought he was actually about to shank me so I totally jumped and was shocked. Not really a burn or anything, but he made me look like a fool in front of all those upperclassmen in that class. Yes... mostly seniors were in that algebra class....
I can honestly say I have really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like.


I don't always post on UG, but when I do, I post in the Pit. Stay thirsty my friends.
#38
Quote by HunterRiggs10
My Geometry teacher told the entire class I was dumb, and that if anyone talked to me I would 'drag them down with me'. Needless to say, I was happy to recieve a compliment like that .

#39
my old tech teacher on fat girls wearing clothes too tight for them.

Mr. P: "Well, there are some girls in this school wearing really tight pants and stuff like that who dont really have the...build to wear it, you know? Like, clothes too small for their size? There's that one girl, I'm sure you all know who I mean."

Student: "You're going to have to be more specific sir, there is alot of girls like that."

Mr. P: "Well actually it's your girlfriend, now that I think about it."

Quote by richwatkinson
haha You pwned an entire website....i bow down...

TheDudeBox
#40
Quote by Brandon860
my old tech teacher on fat girls wearing clothes too tight for them.

Mr. P: "Well, there are some girls in this school wearing really tight pants and stuff like that who dont really have the...build to wear it, you know? Like, clothes too small for their size? There's that one girl, I'm sure you all know who I mean."

Student: "You're going to have to be more specific sir, there is alot of girls like that."

Mr. P: "Well actually it's your girlfriend, now that I think about it."




That's hilarious.
I can honestly say I have really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like.


I don't always post on UG, but when I do, I post in the Pit. Stay thirsty my friends.
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