#1
crit4crit

I hate everything I bought
I hate everything I spent
So I gave up prayer for lent

The only Christ is myself
But if I have to save me
Then I have no chance in Hell

They killed Jesus
To bring us Christmas

I love power and prestige
I love easy, thoughtless jobs
So I made myself into God

But I'm a powerless king
'Cause not even God can stop
The fortune of suffering

They killed Jesus
To bring us Christmas
#2
Quote by themarsvolta

I hate everything I bought
I hate everything I spent
So I gave up prayer for lent

I couldn't think of the connection between prayer, and buying/spending

The only Christ is myself
But if I have to save me
Then I have no chance in Hell

Pretty Cool lines

They killed Jesus
To bring us Christmas

I'm not a big fan of this stanza

I love power and prestige
I love easy, thoughtless jobs
So I made myself into God

Really cool lines/idea, my favorite stanza.

But I'm a powerless king
'Cause not even God can stop
The fortune of suffering

Kind of conflicting lines on this one. First your talking about if you did have power, you would stop suffering (which you call a fortune/good thing) I like the attempt at irony, but it just seems out of place to me


I'm usually a fan of peoples anti-religious poetry so I dug this one. You definitely on to a good start, keep it up man!

Crit?
https://www.ultimate-guitar.com/forum/showthread.php?t=786828
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