#1
She's 14, and she said her boyfriend (who is 13! :O) asked for one for his birthday. How does the Pit feel about this?
There ain't no moral to this story at all. Anything I tell you very well could be a lie.
#3
Personally I'm quite scared as this would mean you know how to give a lap dance
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#5
weird :-/
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#6
im sorry, im mexican so i dont speak 100% english...what the hell is a lap dance?
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#7
So you're some sort of expert in giving lap dances? Why did she ask you how?
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#8
Quote by Pink_blood
Personally I'm quite scared as this would mean you know how to give a lap dance


I don't, she was asking more of what it was rather than how to do it, I should've worded it better.
There ain't no moral to this story at all. Anything I tell you very well could be a lie.
#9
I don't have any strong feelings about it whatsoever...

The question is, why do you?

So this girl wants to give her boyfriend a lapdance.. they're not that great anyways (especially from a girl that doesn't know how to give them), so he'll probably just end up pissed off that she got him that instead of an xbox game or whatever else 13 year olds like
#11
OH NO

I sense the pits teenagers are about to declare their "Moral outrage!" at such a young person performing a sexual act.

Can't wait.

...all the while wishing someone would give them a lap-dance...
On vacation from modding = don't pm me with your pish
#12
tell her something like really off and weird like cover your ass with peanut butter and then rub it on his face and then lick it off
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#14
Errr, bizarre situation much?
On a lighter note Your tele is the sex! :O
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I want C-mak in my bum.


^Think he might have a thing for me...
#15
It appears your friend is on the path to skankhood.

That's just my opinion. I don't really think 14 year olds need to know that...
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thought I was dreaming
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#16
Tell her boyfriend to grow the Hell up.
The will to neither strive nor cry,
The power to feel with others give.
Calm, calm me more; nor let me die
Before I have begun to live.

-Matthew Arnold

Arguments are to be avoided; they are always vulgar and often convincing.
#17
Quote by Pink_blood
Personally I'm quite scared as this would mean you know how to give a lap dance

Well he is a Chippendale dancer.
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#18
Quote by TheQuailman
pfft...
tell her to practice on YOUR ****!.

thats more like it
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#19
Quote by shugo449
tell her something like really off and weird like cover your ass with peanut butter and then rub it on his face and then lick it off



yes, exactly what needs to be done. then tell her to smoke sonoma cigarettes because they are the best. follow that up with a long talk about how beng in a cult isnt all that bad.
#20
Well just tell her basically how to give one, then tell her she can use you as her practice dummy. Make sure to keep a clip board handy and jot down all her pros and cons. After each practice go over your notes and tell her what she's doing well, and what she needs to improve on. It also might help if you get her an informational book on the subject.


Oh, I forgot one thing. This is very important. Remember to wear safety goggles during the practice sessions. It makes the whole thing much more legit.
#21
WHAT THE F IS A LAP DANCE!!! kamasutra maybe...
Quote by Vagabond21
Ewww the searchbar is a slut, it gets used everyday...

Quote by tremeloud

The brain says "hey, lets be friends" and the dick says "hey, lets get those clothes off, eh?"

Quote by Nilpferdkoenig
Yeaaaaaah, Huuuuuhuuuu, Saaaaaaah and MASTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR are all Hetfield memes.
#23
Quote by TheQuailman
pfft...
tell her to practice on YOUR lap.


exactly.............. wait you better not be in highschool then
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#24
Quote by shugo449
tell her something like really off and weird like cover your ass with peanut butter and then rub it on his face and then lick it off



that is the funniest thing ive heard all day.
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#26
Quote by PastaOfMuppets
Tell her to put on her robe and wizard hat.




and add experience points in charisma and stamina.
#28
Quote by MrGuitar123
Oh, Tell her how to do it, and by telling her how to do it, I mean Let her suck your dick.


LMFAO!
Quote by jxljxl
If UG had a Facebook style Relationship thing, I'd e-marry you C-mak


Quote by jxljxl
I want C-mak in my bum.


^Think he might have a thing for me...
#29
Quote by magnum1117
WHAT THE F IS A LAP DANCE!!! kamasutra maybe...


YES.
It is basically running around puking with carrots in your ears and a Zuchini stuck in your bum.


Nah, it is dancing in an erotic kind of way close to / on a guys lap.
#30
Quote by wiggy1988


That picture makes me very uncomfortable.
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rich_sg, I promote you to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. of the Pit. way to speak your opinion.


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RICH_SG you are a filthy person for accusing me of dirty trolling , you are a stiff coconut
#33
I want to know why a 14 yr old kid has a gibson LP standard, an American series Fender Tele and an Orange Rocker 30.

Damn you must be spoiled kid.
#34
Quote by freedoms_stain
I want to know why a 14 yr old kid has a gibson LP standard, an American series Fender Tele and an Orange Rocker 30.

Damn you must be spoiled kid.


I bought the Tele, and I worked in my parent's store to pay off the LP and Orange.
There ain't no moral to this story at all. Anything I tell you very well could be a lie.
#35
Quote by TheQuailman
Yeah, they finally caught you, you damn bastard


They saw through my pedobear costume
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rich_sg, I promote you to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. of the Pit. way to speak your opinion.


Quote by ErnieBallfists
RICH_SG you are a filthy person for accusing me of dirty trolling , you are a stiff coconut
#36
It's kinda sad how kids are getting more sexually active these days. For instance, my friend was looking at this 8th grade girl's cell phone and she was like, "You're not reading my texts, are you?" (Which is the equivalent of someone on UG going "You're not checking the history, are you?" when someone else uses their laptop). So of course he checked the texts. Apparently she and her middle school boyfriend send each other some very graphic text messages.

Yes, phone sex has moved to the text message stage...

By the way, just so I don't sound like an angry old man, I'm 16...
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