#1
This is song i wrote last night

I wrote it based on a documentary that i watched about ex iraq soldiers and based on the fact i was the last person awake at a sleepover

It's called 'Why is it the guilty man that sends the innocent to die'

Intro
And may the last man standing
Fall against his own sword
In the battle to stay, lose the will to survive
Fall upon his own demise

Verse 1
I wish i could spend, just one more lazy day
Away from the gunfire, outside of the battle zone
If i could i would, just glide out of here
Battles that i can't fight, they are all right at home

Pre Chorus
It's my life to live
I've lost my respect for you
I am not yours to waste
So sad but goddamn true

Chorus
Why is it the guilty man
That sends the innocent to die

Verse 2
Just one more lie in, just to lay next to you
To shelter from the death, that i'm ordered to bring
Prison is far more free, death simply liberating
Battling for something stupid, for your greed to sing


Those are all the different bits, it is arranged like this:

Intro (spoken at first)
Verse 1
Pre-Chorus
Chorus
Verse 2
Pre-Chorus
Chorus
Intro (sung this time)
Outro (Chorus spoken over a different chord sequence over and over again as a fade out)

Any feedback, praise/critisisms and queries are much appreciated but not commanded
#2
I like it a lot, I've written a music composition on the same subject, and min has the same arrangement.

It is a bit short, but very nice, good work.
#3
It's a really nice piece man, good work. Although it's short it is very easy to relate to in the current day and the structure of it seems to work very well, I'd love to hear the music for the piece when it is done. Nice work man.

C4C on my latest piece? Link is in my sig.