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#1
My girlfriend's birthday is... TODAY!
I'm supposed to go over there in like an hour,
and I didn't get her anything.
She's said she doesn't want anything, but I feel bad,
and everyone knows how that goes.
The problem is, I don't have any money anyway!
I really don't know what to do.
I'll at least make her a card or something.
Any ideas?
(and I'm ready for the Pit's regular answers, like dicks in boxes)
#3
steal flowers from a neighbors garden? but if all else fails then go with the dick in a box
#4
well... you're single now, congrats.
Quote by GeneralGrim
So we had a music battle, copying what each other did and upping the ante and whatnot. After awhile of going nowhere, I said to the pianist "let's see you do this, asshole" played a single note... and bent it up a step. And left.
#5
cut your ear off and put it in a box

or steal something

or just tell her the truth and make her a proise [only you guys really do love each other though]
#7
Basically
Write her a quick poem
Make her a card
Make her small cards which she can use for 'services'
hugs,massages etc
Use your imagination....or google
#9
write her a song , that worked for my gf lol
music=life
everything else is just details
#11
Just say, you did get her something but tell her you want to add some finishing touches, and buy a few other things before you give it to her. And wait until you do have money, buy the stuff. Give it to her and say sorry it took so long. Mission Accomplished.
♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪♫♪♪

Quote by Rune Playaz
I vote thycrusader for 'The guy who hit the nail on the head'


Quote by Emilyyy.
thycrusader = Thigh_Crusader
#12
Make her a mix CD? oh and find a random peice of jewelry tell her it a family heirloom and you wan't her to have it. If all else fails dick in box
MASSIVE TEXT
#13
Quote by Jackolas
"Hey babe.. I got you... a penis!"

+1

Or make her that card and maybe play her a song...I'm not too sure. Maybe admitting that you don't have money will help, and that when you get enough, you'll get her something nice.

Those are just suggestions
#14
very reliable you are
Hull City A.F.C

Quote by Thrashtastic15
crunkym toy diuckl;ess ass ****igkjn ****** **** bitch ass pussy ****er douchecanoe ****** **** you s omn cnt you lieet le biutch
#15
Quote by Jackolas
"Hey babe.. I got you... a penis!"

close.

The answer in this situation is always:

Dick in a box!!!!!
#18
Quote by thycrusader
Just say, you did get her something but tell her you want to add some finishing touches, and buy a few other things before you give it to her. And wait until you do have money, buy the stuff. Give it to her and say sorry it took so long. Mission Accomplished.

That's a really good idea!

Or I'll use some other ideas, like a poem and card,
and get her something later too.

Problems with some suggestions:
-she doesn't like chocolate!
-I can't write songs! Let alone in less than an hour!
#20
Artwork, I made a painting on for my girlfriend.
Of coure you only have an hour so...
Dick in a Box?
Alice in Chains, Days of the New, Tool, and The Meat Puppets... these are a few of my favorite things
#21
step one get a box
step 2 cut a hole in the box
step three... put your dick in the box
Quote by RPGoof
I feel dirty just reading that word. Grindcore... EW... I need a shower

Quote by stratkat
music is my meth equivalent
#23
play her little wing

and if that doesn't get you into her pants quicker than a gynacologist then ive ran out of ideas
Quote by Lord-O-Donuts
'Nine out of ten people actually enjoy gang rape.'
#24
You could go for the honest approach...and say you ordered some AMAZING gift, that just hasn't arrived yet.


Then in a weeks time, Dick in a Box!
HYPOCRITE OPPORTUNIST


#25
Quote by Godsmack311
buy her a smiling pear with internet abbreviations

I should take the original and put Happy Birthday!
That'd be pretty funny!
#26
Quote by sadistic_monkey
Just buy her Halo 3. Girls dig that game


+1
#27
Quote by byob_soad2
I should take the original and put Happy Birthday!
That'd be pretty funny!


No. Just no.

It's bad enough that you didn't get her anything (people lie when they say "don't bother getting me anything"), but you'd be making the situation worse by introducing unfunny to her life.
#28
Tie a nice ribbon around your penis, walk into her house and drop your pants. It cannot fail.
The DNA results show that Jeremy Kyle is a nob.


Quote by titsmcgee852
I want to look at your sexual naked body.
#29
hello my lovely (insert name)
You look awesomely hot
i want to grab your (insert rhyme to her name)
or would you like my dick in a box?
I know it seems cheap,
but this is all i could get
i took 12 viagras
and i can no longer sit.
love,

Byob_soad2
Alice in Chains, Days of the New, Tool, and The Meat Puppets... these are a few of my favorite things
#30
Get her flowers and write her a song.
ESP Custom Shop 40th Anniversary Eclipse
ESP Standard Eclipse-II
Ibanez AF85VLS
#31
print out a card online. like use wordart to make it all fancy. then make poem in then fold it. it's the thought that counts. or u could write her a song and sing it to her, girls like that I think. I'm sure you can find something in your house that you can give. OH I just have an idea. I saw this on that 70's show, you take naked pictures of yourself. hehe, usually it works for girls, but u can do it too hehehe
#32
Write her a card (more of a poetic card) explaining all the beautiful qualities she has.
Something in the lines of: "Happy Birthday "gf"! You are one of the most lovely people to have been born on earth, without you my life would be incomplete and I'd be missing my other half etc etc etc..."

Secret: Put all your emotion to that card and be sure that when she reads she would feel emotional (in conclusion write a card that'll make her cry of happiness if you know she's sensible)

Try not to sound cheesy on every line you write though...
D F O I N N T D
T W H O I R S D
Y O O R U
W S I U L C L K
A M S Y S

Quote by ScreamAim&Fire


Beautiful.
XxLloydxX for president!
Even though I'm english..

Want to hear Super Mario Bros Theme on electric rock guitar? SuperMarioBro
BuyMYMusic
SellMusic
#33
go get a little piece of uncooked steak and wrap it in a box and then be like "I'm giving you a piece of my heart." she takes the box hoping for some sappy metaphor, but BAM!
#34
Quote by guylee
go get a little piece of uncooked steak and wrap it in a box and then be like "I'm giving you a piece of my heart." she takes the box hoping for some sappy metaphor, but BAM!


I laughed so hard on that one!
D F O I N N T D
T W H O I R S D
Y O O R U
W S I U L C L K
A M S Y S

Quote by ScreamAim&Fire


Beautiful.
XxLloydxX for president!
Even though I'm english..

Want to hear Super Mario Bros Theme on electric rock guitar? SuperMarioBro
BuyMYMusic
SellMusic
#35
Quote by XxLloydxX
Write her a card (more of a poetic card) explaining all the beautiful qualities she has.
Something in the lines of: "Happy Birthday "gf"! You are one of the most lovely people to have been born on earth, without you my life would be incomplete and I'd be missing my other half etc etc etc..."

Secret: Put all your emotion to that card and be sure that when she reads she would feel emotional (in conclusion write a card that'll make her cry of happiness if you know she's sensible)

Try not to sound cheesy on every line you write though...

Quote by NobNob
hello my lovely (insert name)
You look awesomely hot
i want to grab your (insert rhyme to her name)
or would you like my dick in a box?
I know it seems cheap,
but this is all i could get
i took 12 viagras
and i can no longer sit.


love,

Byob_soad2


I already did that for him
Alice in Chains, Days of the New, Tool, and The Meat Puppets... these are a few of my favorite things
#36
I love the mix of serious and funny replies,
thanks guys.
I'm gonna find a picture and write a poem or something like that.
and try to find something to give her.
#37
Quote by byob_soad2
I love the mix of serious and funny replies,
thanks guys.
I'm gonna find a picture and write a poem or something like that.
and try to find something to give her.

I think my poem works for that. Whats her name?
Alice in Chains, Days of the New, Tool, and The Meat Puppets... these are a few of my favorite things
#38
Quote by NobNob
I think my poem works for that. Whats her name?

Her name's Ariana.
But I don't have ink or paper to print anything.
#39
Go with the steak (heart) in a box,... that made me laugh, and what girl doesn't like a bloke who can make her laugh.

Ya never know,... maybe all she's looking forward to is seeing you and being made a fuss of. Just be extra attentive, she'll more than understand if she knows you're broke. If she kicks off because you didn't get her summit expensive then you're best off without.
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