#1
well here we go, I know there is a ton of them out there


*Chuck Norris once ate twelve 72 ounce steaks in an hour, the first 45 minutes consisted of him having sex with a waitress.

*Most people arent aware that the opening scene to Saving Private Ryan was loosely based on a dodgeball game that Chuck Norris played in 2nd grade.

*Chuck Norris once gave a horse a roundhouse kick to the chin, we now know its descendents as the giraffe.

*Chuck Norris can divide by 0.

*Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pie.

*Chuck Norris went on vacation to the Virgin Islands, when he came back they were just called the islands.
#2
lol
Quote by jonathan92
schecter damien 7 is one monster of a guitar.


[Proud owner of a Schecter Damien 7]
#3
after a hard night of partying, chuck norris doesnt throw up, he throws down.... saw it on a t-shirt.
EDIT: forgot one. chuck norris doesnt tea-bag the ladies, he potatoe-sacks them
#6
Chuck Norris once got a paper cut, so he put a Band Aid on it to stop the bleeding.

Chuck Norris went to IHOP and ordered some pancakes.

Chuck Norris ironed his suit because he was going to a wedding.
#7
Quote by Matticusg
after a hard night of partying, chuck norris doesnt throw up, he throws down.... saw it on a t-shirt.

i have that shirt. it is amazing
Quote by Peradactyl
alright, off topic but how do i make forum posts



Quote by The_Paranoia
a4lrocker is an offical thread legend.
#8
while most people wear superman pajamas, superman wears chuck norris pajamas

in the beginning, there was nothing, but chuck norris roundhouse kicked it and told it to get a job, and now we have the universe

chuck norris does not have a chin, only a third fist hiding behind his beard.
Proud member of r0k 4 Chr15t club, PM T3hRav3n/christianbassis to join.

The Rig:
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#10
Chuck Norris never uses the search bar, because already knows there are a few dozen threads on his magnificent jokes.


ok, yeah. my name is silly because I signed up when I was 13.

BEDBUGS
#11
Quote by DaStrat0blast3r
great, now chuck norris is gonna sue UG to.

Chuck Norris doesn't need to sue something he already pwned.
I'm a Mormon.

Gear:
Schecter C-1+
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#14
In this thread it is 2005
My style is impetuous.
My defense is impregnable, and I'm just ferocious.
I want your heart.
I want to eat your children.

-Mike Tyson
#15
Chuck Norris knows where Carmen SanDiego is.

Chuck Norris invented water.

It only takes Chuck Norris 15 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Every time you masturbate, Chuck Norris destroys an orphanage.

When Chuck Norris jumps into a pool, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck.

Always capitalize Chuck Norris...you get the idea.
Quote by SeveralSpecies
How the f*ck are you gonna get a cat to bark?


---------------------------5------8-----7-
----------------5-------------------------
------------------1-3-3-------/6----/5----
-1/3--1-1h3-------------------------------


Matt Freeman>You
#17
Quote by icon_player_5
chuck norris does not have a chin, only a third fist hiding behind his beard.

i made a picture of me being punched by chucks third fist. i was bored. lol.
Quote by Peradactyl
alright, off topic but how do i make forum posts



Quote by The_Paranoia
a4lrocker is an offical thread legend.
#18
Quote by TheBassMan3
Chuck Norris knows where Carmen SanDiego is.

Chuck Norris invented water.

It only takes Chuck Norris 15 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Every time you masturbate, Chuck Norris destroys an orphanage.

When Chuck Norris jumps into a pool, he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck.

Always capitalize Chuck Norris...you get the idea.



Im adding these 2 to my montage
#19
Fight between superman and spiderman - who wins?

Chuck Norris.
Quote by SteveHouse
Also you're off topic. This thread is about Reva eating snowmen.