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#1
I was inspired by the thread about fat chicks liking guys so i thought i'd make one about the funniest/weirdest things people have seen or done to pick up a girl/guy they liked.

Personal fave of mine is when u get some ice and walk up to a girl, drop it on the floor and then say.."now that i've broken the ice..do you wana go out some time?"

its al oldie but i was out one night with my mates one night and my mate dean tried it. The girls he went up to thought it was hilarious but he didn't get anywhere...



share stories!!!
sacrificial beaver of the laney cult

~Gear~

Schecter C-7 Hellraiser
ESP LTD F-2005
Laney VH100R *with free cab*
Roland Cube 60
Cort Acoustic
#2
I usually just say something along the lines of "Bitch get in the car. We're going to McDonalds."
I believe in Rock and Roll. Can I get an Amen?

Quote by rizo299
A drunk guy on the the bus asked me if i remembered the 60's. I told him i was 17 then he told me that everyone remembers the 60's.

I thought about it, and frankly, I couldn't fault his logic.
#4
what if it gets bombed by jamie oliver???

*See other thread* lol
sacrificial beaver of the laney cult

~Gear~

Schecter C-7 Hellraiser
ESP LTD F-2005
Laney VH100R *with free cab*
Roland Cube 60
Cort Acoustic
#6
the ol' "anthrax in the secret admirer note" trick never fails.
My live set-up:
72 Tele Custom
TC Electronics Polytune
MXR Dynacomp
deviever Shoe Gazer
Way Huge Red Llama Clone
Effector13 Soda Meiser
Vintage Proco Rat
DOD Buzzbox
Dwarfcraft Robot Devil
EA Tremolo
Lovepedal Pickle Vibe
Traynor YBA-2B
#7
Argh, I'm Captain Ahab- Thar she, blows, the great white whale!
#8
There's bound to be a lot of responses involving chloroform.
Lord knows I'm weak, won't somebody get me off of this reef...
#9
ok i heared about a classmate:

He saw a girl and grabbed her 0,5L Cola-Light. She was screaming at him . Then he looked at her and took out a 1,5L Cola-Light of his bag, and said "u dont have to thank me" and walked away.
Quote by frankv
Tokio Hotel is probably the worst thing Germany has produced since WW2.


#10
Girl walks down street. Man runs up and pushes her through the open door of a moving van. Inside the van are four guys with handcuffs and whips. One lights a candle for romance.
#11
Quote by Toast1337
ok i heared about a classmate:

He saw a girl and grabbed her 0,5L Cola-Light. She was screaming at him . Then he looked at her and took out a 1,5L Cola-Light of his bag, and said "u dont have to thank me" and walked away.


nice...but then all that coke will make her fat, delirious with no teeth. I don't care if its light that **** is still bad for you
sacrificial beaver of the laney cult

~Gear~

Schecter C-7 Hellraiser
ESP LTD F-2005
Laney VH100R *with free cab*
Roland Cube 60
Cort Acoustic
#14
Quote by blue_strat
Girl walks down street. Man runs up and pushes her through the open door of a moving van. Inside the van are four guys with handcuffs and whips. One lights a candle for romance.



Awww, how sweet!
#17
If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
Quote by Muphin
Maybe if the Jews were kind to Hitler the holocaust wouldn't have happened.


Hahaha
#20
I don't pick up girls, I tie them down.
Quote by Tire Me.
Raping her in front of other people would be morally wrong.

Quote by Bubbles516
wtf290 uses make bubbles feel like crap
Its super effective!
#21
Guy: "Fancy coming to my place, have some Pizza and some hot ****ing?

Girl: "No"

Guy: "What? You Don't like Pizza?"
#22
Haha, when I read the title I just thought "with a spoon"
YellowGreenBlueRed


Quote by webbtje
You live in a ruler, the only child of trouser water (?); it's very fantastic, and salami!
#23
"I bet you 50p I can make your tits juggle without touching them"
*feel her tits, then give her 50p*
"Best damn 50p I ever spent"
#24
A friend of mine told her little brother to go pick up a chick at a baseball game.

So he found a girl he didn't know, lugged her over his sholder, and brought her back.
Quote by boreamor
Thousands upon thousands of people yelling "IcyHot"...

Quote by imdeth
She looks like she has triforces in her eyes...

Quote by Nakon14
*sigh* yet again, only on UG would somebody rush to their computer to tell the pit when their lives or property are in dire trouble.
#25
this one girl shook her sexy ass in front of me and became my wife. So did her best friend and my girl was watching lol so its temporary sadly
Quote by nasstyman
i don't do drugs but i fook like a pronstar and i drink like a fish and smoke like a chimney....
#26
Quote by Doug_Funnie
Guy: "Fancy coming to my place, have some Pizza and some hot ****ing?

Girl: "No"

Guy: "What? You Don't like Pizza?"


Oh god. That was awesome .
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#27
Quote by Doug_Funnie
Guy: "Fancy coming to my place, have some Pizza and some hot ****ing?

Girl: "No"

Guy: "What? You Don't like Pizza?"



WIN!!!!!
#29
i'd say the best way to pick up a girl is by her hair.
Quote by rorythefaggot
I am a clock.

What am I?



GO PHILLIES
#30
"Excuse me, but does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

Edit: Damn, beaten to it
I'M GOING NUCKING FUTS!

#33
Tap her on the shoulder from behind. When she turns round ask her if she wouldn't mind holding your drink (you don't actually have one). When she looks down have your index finger and thumb in a little circle so that she looks through the hole. Clock her in the jaw.
#34
I've said it before and I'll say it again.
Chloroform.
Rohypnol.
A sock with half a brick in it.
Pick one, run with it.

The last successful method was to stroll in, in full pirate gear, shout "Aarrr, dance with me wenches!"
Then dance* with every girl there.
Although, the girl I ended up with was the one I was staying with anyway.

*I say dance, it was more of a stagger.
#35
Quote by Toast1337
ok i heared about a classmate:

He saw a girl and grabbed her 0,5L Cola-Light. She was screaming at him . Then he looked at her and took out a 1,5L Cola-Light of his bag, and said "u dont have to thank me" and walked away.


That would have been so much better if the girl had a regular, full cola and your friend gave her a light cola and said "you don't have to thank me".
#36
"nice shirt, it'd look better in a pile on my floor"

or,
"have you ever kissed a bunny between the ears?"
"nope"
*pulls out pockets*
Member #14 of the "Claudio Sanchez is god" Club.

My Gear:
Schecter C-1 Hellraiser
Epiphone G-400
Fender Precision Bass
Ibanez Exotic Wood Acoustic
Crate BX-15
Crate Palomino V16
Proco Rat 2
Dunlop 353q Crybaby
#39
Quote by jemocam
Dose this cloth smell like chloroform to you?


That was long overdue.
The only things we hate are those things we try to hide from others.

Quote by Deliriumbassist
Quote by Carmel
Either way, I don't think bananas should be placed in such proximity to an ass

I disagree. Bananas and ass are like peaches and cream.
#40
Quote by bobby_splax

"have you ever kissed a bunny between the ears?"
"nope"
*pulls out pockets*



Some that I've found. (I have about 5 pages of them somewhere, but I didn't wanna make a giant post)

Apart from being y, what do you do for a living?
Are you accepting applications for your fan club?
Be unique and different, say yes.
Can I flirt with you?
Can I get a picture of you so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
Did you hear the latest health report? You need to up your daily intake of
vitamin me.
Do you have a boyfriend? No. Want one?(if yes: Want another one?)
Do you like music? (Yes) Good, I've got a great stereo system at home!
Excuse me, but you have a beep on your nose. What? (reach up and gently
squeeze her nose) BEEP. (If she laughs, she's yours; if she looks at you
funny, apologize.)
He: You look like my third wife. She: Oh, how many time have you been
married? He: Twice.
Hey, come here often? You could, with me.
Hi. I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?
I have only three months to live.
ok, yeah. my name is silly because I signed up when I was 13.

BEDBUGS
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