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#1
The first one asks for some blood, and so does the second one.
The third vampire asks for a pot of boiling water and the other vampires ask why he didn't order blood...so he pulls out a used tampon and says: "I'm making tea."

#11
I don't get it. Won't he need blood as well as a tampon and boiling water to make the tea? Or is his vagina bleeding?
#13
Here's another one:

Little Jimmy says to his mom: "Mom, the kids at school are mean to me and call me a vampire." his mom answers: "Oh just ignore them, they're just being silly. Now finish your soup before it coagulates."


Quote by AngelOfHatred
I don't get it. Won't he need blood as well as a tampon and boiling water to make the tea? Or is his vagina bleeding?


... facepalm?

And yes, his vagina is bleeding.
Dear God, do you actually answer prayers?

Yes, but only in a way indistinguishable from random luck or the result of your own efforts.
#14
What is this concept of the 3 in the 1. It seems like the basis of human creation throughout history

3 things go into 1 thing and somehow humour will occur...
#16
These vampire jokes are ****. Not the ****, just plain old regular ****.
"Punk is a state of mind, and no one can take that away from you."
#17
Quote by DiMeTiMe
****!!! There's blood IN the tampon!



OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

You should have stated that the tampon already contains blood.

EDIT: Oh, it does say used tampon. Well I'll be damned...
#18
Quote by Mad Marius
Here's another one:

Little Jimmy says to his mom: "Mom, the kids at school are mean to me and call me a vampire." his mom answers: "Oh just ignore them, they're just being silly. Now finish your soup before it coagulates."


This one beats the threadstarter's.
#22
Quote by Mad Marius
Here's another one:

Little Jimmy says to his mom: "Mom, the kids at school are mean to me and call me a vampire." his mom answers: "Oh just ignore them, they're just being silly. Now finish your soup before it coagulates."

I laughed

also e-cookies to you for your awesome avatar/tag-line
HADOUKEN!! Click For UG's Street Fighter Group

Quote by synpet713192

I'd never seen you around until very recently, but this and the other pic have caused me to worship you
#23
Quote by rush4life
This one beats the threadstarter's.


hell no
Trust me I'm a doctor

A doctor with a mustache
#24
i get it.

TS, you do know theres no 'tea' in a tampon, a tampon is used to absorb blood from a faulty vagina.

frickin' idiot.
Quote by Samnung
im gunna rape u

Quote by GuitarManiac09
Stay away you freak....I dont want you spreading your hideous crab population..




METALLICA AT WEMBLEY 08/07/07
#25
Quote by dumps
i get it.

TS, you do know theres no 'tea' in a tampon, a tampon is used to absorb blood from a faulty vagina.

frickin' idiot.


No, he's putting it in the boiling water - you know how to make tea right?

EDIT: Oh, I see what you're doing here..
#26
Man, some of you people are really dense.
Dear God, do you actually answer prayers?

Yes, but only in a way indistinguishable from random luck or the result of your own efforts.
#27
Quote by dumps
i get it.

TS, you do know theres no 'tea' in a tampon, a tampon is used to absorb blood from a faulty vagina.

frickin' idiot.


Yeah but it's a vampire, and vampires like blood rather than tea. And, the blood's from a vagina, so it's a bonus.
#28
Quote by hazzmatazz
What is this concept of the 3 in the 1. It seems like the basis of human creation throughout history

3 things go into 1 thing and somehow humour will occur...


That actually did make me laugh, I guess you're right...
#29
wow, i guess it's hard to note sarcasm over the internet.

lols
Quote by Samnung
im gunna rape u

Quote by GuitarManiac09
Stay away you freak....I dont want you spreading your hideous crab population..




METALLICA AT WEMBLEY 08/07/07
#30
Quote by hazzmatazz
What is this concept of the 3 in the 1. It seems like the basis of human creation throughout history

3 things go into 1 thing and somehow humour will occur...


And when I first started reading this post, it all just started unravelling in a sense of tedious inevitability.

And some of you are dumb if you don't get the TS's joke.
#31
that was a decent joke, and those of you that don't get it shouldnt be calling other people twelve. they apparently havnt gotten their yet themselves.
The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far.
#33
Quote by dumps
i get it.

TS, you do know theres no 'tea' in a tampon, a tampon is used to absorb blood from a faulty vagina.

frickin' idiot.


So if a girl has a period she has a...faulty vagina?

I think the idiot calling is reflected with my...


FLAME SHIELD

#34
Two lesbian vampires walk out of a hotel room. One turns to the other and says "See you next month"
667 The neighbor of the beast


Yamaha APX-8S
#36
lol i shall never try and be sarcastic over the internet again.

jesus.

i know its the lowest form of humor, but **** me you guys are an even lower form if you cant see it. the joke is easy... ah i cant be assed to rant, basically...YOU GOT PUNKD M'uthA FUKA!

what ever. night xx

Quote by CLVPX
So if a girl has a period she has a...faulty vagina?

I think the idiot calling is reflected with my...


god... i was saying that for comedy. FOR COMEDY!

i forgot to put that /sarcasm at the end of my post, god help me, what an error i made. that slanted line and simple word could of saved me and made me a funny guy.
Quote by Samnung
im gunna rape u

Quote by GuitarManiac09
Stay away you freak....I dont want you spreading your hideous crab population..




METALLICA AT WEMBLEY 08/07/07
Last edited by dumps at Mar 10, 2008,
#40
Quote by CLVPX
right, ok then dumps, sorry. MAH BAD!

Sorry, I've had a bad night.


Quote by Samnung
im gunna rape u

Quote by GuitarManiac09
Stay away you freak....I dont want you spreading your hideous crab population..




METALLICA AT WEMBLEY 08/07/07
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