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#1
so my mom comes home from wal mart today and she says to me.."***** we need to have a talk."

So I'm like okay..shes probably just gonna tell me i need to quit spending so much time on Xbox Live.

Keep in mind..last saturday was Prom.

"******, while you were golfing today, your father called. He asked me to go out to your car and get your paperwork for the tax refund. I opened the glove box, and out fell four Trojan Condoms."

I shit 4 plasma tv's.

I say, "Oh..yeah..about those..a friend of mine ga-"
Mom-"Are you fucking M********"
Me, "OMG only once!"
Mom " Who gave you the condoms?"
Me "Adam did! I didn't have the balls to buy em myself!"
Mom, "well im glad you're honest..but you cant be boning M****** using condoms you havent bought. I bought you a box today..but don't tell your dad"

Discuss interesting stories about your parents or guardians
#2
...thats really awkward.
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#4
Quote by LSC300
so my mom comes home from wal mart today and she says to me.."***** we need to have a talk."

So I'm like okay..shes probably just gonna tell me i need to quit spending so much time on Xbox Live.

Keep in mind..last saturday was Prom.

"******, while you were golfing today, your father called. He asked me to go out to your car and get your paperwork for the tax refund. I opened the glove box, and out fell four Trojan Condoms."

I shit 4 plasma tv's.

I say, "Oh..yeah..about those..a friend of mine ga-"
Mom-"Are you fucking M********"
Me, "OMG only once!"
Mom " Who gave you the condoms?"
Me "Adam did! I didn't have the balls to buy em myself!"
Mom, "well im glad you're honest..but you cant be boning M****** using condoms you havent bought. I bought you a box today..but don't tell your dad"

Discuss interesting stories about your parents or guardians




Also, at first, I thought your mom walked in and said "Bitch, we need to have a talk!" Since you bleeped out what I assume is your name. It gave me the lulz the first time I read it.
#6
Quote by Beakwithteeth


What is the point of this thread?


to prove he got laid
signed,
your favorite poster
#8
lol to share interesting stories about your parents or guardians..or girlfriend..or boyfriend..don matter!
#10
ebragging: its never pathetic.


oh wait, i got that wrong.
.
..
...
I have no opinion on this matter.
#11
IN THIS THREAD: post interesting stories

that will definitely save us from making new threads
signed,
your favorite poster
#13
My friend and I were getting ready to go hang out outside one day, and we were talking to my mom. Out of nowhere, she hands me like eight condoms. I'm like, "MOM! What am I, a rabbit?!" lol
#14
Quote by 1The_Trooper1


Also, at first, I thought your mom walked in and said "Bitch, we need to have a talk!" Since you bleeped out what I assume is your name. It gave me the lulz the first time I read it.


that would've been amazing
#15
when your parents start buying you weed, i'll respect you.
Quote by Chikitty_China
Well, when I'm fapping, I sometimes look at my left hand and wonder what could have been ....
#16
Quote by 1The_Trooper1


Also, at first, I thought your mom walked in and said "Bitch, we need to have a talk!" Since you bleeped out what I assume is your name. It gave me the lulz the first time I read it.

i did that too
Call me Jack
#18
Quote by sSyLc
Pics of Melanie?

My guess was Monica.

Though Melissa is another option.
#20
Quote by 1The_Trooper1


Also, at first, I thought your mom walked in and said "Bitch, we need to have a talk!" Since you bleeped out what I assume is your name. It gave me the lulz the first time I read it.

I thought the exact same thing
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Woah, woah. Back the hell up.

Polo shirt?

Sunglasses?

Of course he got all the girls, he's Rick Astley.
#21
Quote by nalyd
My guess was Monica.

Though Melissa is another option.

Or Marissa, Mischa, Michelle . . .
Quote by markr17
go eat a hermanpherdite.
#22
I got laid on the 29th of February. It was on a leap year. Kick ass.
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#24
Haha. I mostly lol'd because of the way you have your mom talking. Your mom said "boning" so and so? I have my doubts.
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#25
Wait wait wait wait


**** me a tv plz?
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#26
Quote by element4433
Wait wait wait wait


**** me a tv plz?



Martha? Such a librarian name.
Quote by markr17
go eat a hermanpherdite.
#28
Quote by wemonir
to prove he got laid

Quote by Lil Macker
I voted 9, cause I would only let my mum give me a handjob...

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#29
Quote by nalyd
My guess was Monica.

Though Melissa is another option.

It could be Michael, for all we know he might have boned a dude.....
GOODBYE BLUE SKY
#30
i get laid like..everyday multiple times a day


lmfao
my mom knows.
cause this time i ****ed my now fiance, he was with another girl
who happend to be one of my "friends"
anyways i got into the car ride to go home
and i was like
"MOM I ****ED ANDRES,...AND I SMOKE!!!"
im surprised she didnt kill me in the car from the reaction

shes okay with it. she jokes about it , if Andres is around
she'll be like "BE SAFE KIDS USE CONDOMS"
#31
Quote by M.O.P
It could be Michael, for all we know he might have boned a dude.....

**** me, you're absolutely right. TS, please accept my apologies for making broad assumptions. I'm terribly sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I was just going with guy instinct though. Melanie was honestly the first name that popped into my mind.
Sorry again.
Quote by markr17
go eat a hermanpherdite.
#32
Quote by nalyd
My guess was Monica.

Though Melissa is another option.

haha I thought Marissa

"When I die, I want people to play my music, go wild and freak out and do anything they want to do." - Jimi Hendrix


"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality." - John Lennon


I'm a GIRL!
#34
Quote by JessicaGonzo
Ha i was there when my mom found my brothers condoms......
He tried to hide them in his shoe...lmao.

i hide mine inside my bible

srsly
#35
Quote by MegaJeff
i hide mine inside my bible

srsly


He's comin' for ya
*-)
Quote by Bob_Sacamano
i kinda wish we all had a penis and vagina instead of buttholes

i mean no offense to buttholes and poop or anything

Rest in Peace, Troy Davis and Trayvon Martin and Jordan Davis and Eric Garner and Mike Brown
#36
Quote by sSyLc
Or Marissa, Mischa, Michelle . . .

oh, there it is...

"When I die, I want people to play my music, go wild and freak out and do anything they want to do." - Jimi Hendrix


"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality." - John Lennon


I'm a GIRL!
#37
Quote by sSyLc
**** me, you're absolutely right. TS, please accept my apologies for making broad assumptions. I'm terribly sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I was just going with guy instinct though. Melanie was honestly the first name that popped into my mind.
Sorry again.


its ok man... the thread got close... we still got the memories
#39
Quote by just17n8
its ok man... the thread got close... we still got the memories

and a group
Quote by markr17
go eat a hermanpherdite.
#40
I remember my brother hiding his on a bag of chips.. like waaaay at the bottom... so, one day my aunt came over for a "chat" with my mom.. and they were talking, and my mom goes like, hey, can you give me the chips please? and I go like.. um, um.. chips? EW.. its 3 pm mom! you totally dissapoint me.. so, she sends me one of THOSE looks, and takes them herself, and puts them into a big, big bowl.... it was so fun watching my aunts face when instead of chips a surprise came uot of that bag... hahaha

"When I die, I want people to play my music, go wild and freak out and do anything they want to do." - Jimi Hendrix


"A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality." - John Lennon


I'm a GIRL!
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