#1
i dont think this would go in the drug thread cause its not about drugs, more about my friend whos on drugs.
its about 3 in the morning here and my friend called me a little while ago asking me for money.
i have the money but i turned him down cause i know hes just gonna go out and get all ****ed up and i cant give him the money for that. (ive given him money before but that was a while ago when he wasnt as messed up)
the problem is i know hes going to get the money somehow and hes probably just gonna end up getting in deep **** for doing something stupid so should i just give it to him???
i know hes gonna call me sooner or later cause asking once isnt really his thing.
and even worse hes putting me through this guilt trip cause im kind of the reason he got into drugs. i introduced him to pot which turned into us both using oxy, valium, and other ****. i quit using but hes still stuck with this habit so i cant just turn him down.
the only thing im contemplating right now is whether to just give him the money so he doesnt end up in trouble.
i wont expect any real answers, ill deal with things myself but any help would be appreciated.
Send me off to bed forevermore.
#2
Wow this is a thread with some actual substance... in the Pit no less.

Since you have an Otis Redding in your sig, I'll try to help.

How much do you care about your friend?
#3
wow. your situation clearly sucks. how else would this friend get the money if you didn't give it to him? are we talking stealing? something worse?
#4
hes a good friend of mine,
im the only one that really talks to him, he basically pissed everyone away but like i said, i got him into drugs and i cant just ignore him.
i dont know exactly how hes going to get the money, most likely stealing from his dad.
hes gotten into a habit of asking me cause he knows ill usually give him what he wants but i really dont know what to do. i dont want him to end up dead with drugs that i paid for. (or at all for that matter)
Send me off to bed forevermore.
#5
if he ****s up then maybe he'll learn.

don't do it.
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#6
are you saying he would get in trouble because he would steal the money or rob the dealer. I mean if u feel like giving it him tonight do it. But you need to sit him down and have a talk with him about his use and see what you can do to help him
#7
What kind(s) of drugs is your friend messed up on. Are we talking hard stuff like meth, crack etc? Because in that case there is a big probability that he might end up doing something stupid. If you can afford it give him the money right now, but figure out a solid plan to help him in the mean time.
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#8
Don't give him the money.
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#9
Quote by RatmN'Roses
hes a good friend of mine,
im the only one that really talks to him, he basically pissed everyone away but like i said, i got him into drugs and i cant just ignore him.
i dont know exactly how hes going to get the money, most likely stealing from his dad.
hes gotten into a habit of asking me cause he knows ill usually give him what he wants but i really dont know what to do. i dont want him to end up dead with drugs that i paid for. (or at all for that matter)

Since you got him into drugs (I'm assuming the heavy shiit), you should help him to get out. It's tough but even it's better than having him in jail or in the dirt. Have you tried to get him some help? Like from a professional?
#10
you got him in and deserted him by quitting. get him out too!
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#11
hes on meth, and takes valium often.
i already gave him some money.
ive tried talking to him before but if you've ever talked to an addict about their problems you know it doesnt end well. (especially if you're the one that got them hooked)
any other help if you've been in the same situation would really help.
thanks for the help so far though.
Send me off to bed forevermore.
#12
No money. BECAUSE...(omg a pit dweller explaining themselves?!)

yes, you got him involved.
this most likely means you started before him, right?
and you were able to quit.
show him the positives (and negatives for the sake of an even arguement)
show him he can quit and spend his money on better things


like hookers.
the game
#13
Quote by imgooley
Since you got him into drugs (I'm assuming the heavy shiit), you should help him to get out. It's tough but even it's better than having him in jail or in the dirt. Have you tried to get him some help? Like from a professional?

almost exactly what I was going to say. but before you get him professional help, sit him down yourself and talk to him about his problem.
#15
Quote by amaqqut
almost exactly what I was going to say. but before you get him professional help, sit him down yourself and talk to him about his problem.

He said that he has already tried to talk to him.

I have a few family members who are like that (on drugs). Like my uncle. He is currently in prison in I think either Iowa or SO Cal. My dad tried to simply talk to him and help him (even gave him a place to live) and he pissed it away.

Your friend needs professional help of some sort. If someone knows of a program or something that could help, they should post it.


How did you get off the junk?
#16
i got out of using before i got addicted. (thanks to my drummer and bassist.)
i had my band to keep me clean but he didnt really have much.
its really hard to talk to him, he wont listen to reason and he never stays on the subject. if i try to help him he usually just ignores me.
im scared to get him professional help cause i dont want him to think i turned him in or anything like that. if he gets clean after that would be great but if he just went back to drugs then he wouldnt talk to me again.
Send me off to bed forevermore.
#17
if you REALLY care about him, you'll get him professional help and not care what he thinks of you. inside, you will know that you potencially saved his life/stopped him from getting even more ****ed up.
#18
But think about it dude, if you got him help, and he gets clean, he will be grateful to you. And if he hates you, and is still comes clean, then it is still worth it because he will still be alive and out of prison.
#19
and as a note to yourself, don't feel guilty. At the end of the day it was his decision to keep doing drugs and yours to stop. Don't let this matter send you on a "guilt trip" if he asks you again. Also, don't know if this will help at all but theres a documentary out there called Dark Days, its about the homeless in New York. A big part of it is about addiction to crack. There one guy who tells his story of how he ended up homeless and a total addict and how he managed to quit. Helped me quit smoking cigarettes. Yes i know that meth is a bit different but its worth a try if he is willing to watch it that is.
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#20
Quote by RatmN'Roses
i got out of using before i got addicted. (thanks to my drummer and bassist.)
i had my band to keep me clean but he didnt really have much.
its really hard to talk to him, he wont listen to reason and he never stays on the subject. if i try to help him he usually just ignores me.
im scared to get him professional help cause i dont want him to think i turned him in or anything like that. if he gets clean after that would be great but if he just went back to drugs then he wouldnt talk to me again.


get his friends, family, etc together for one of those nifty intervention shows.
its a less assholish way to help him [from his point of view]

also...it doesn't look like 'oh here's some dude that f*cked his life up]

its 'here's someone who needs help with his family and friends helping him'
the game
#22
as much as rehab would help im afraid hes going to relapse and get worse.
im trying to find something for him to look foward to, or something worth quiting for.
i really think music is a lifesaver but its not for everyone.
ill do what i can, and thanks for the help.
Send me off to bed forevermore.