#1
i am having some issues with my drummer
he is realyl a nice guy a good friend but he really thinks he is awesome and that we(guitar dude and me) are stoping the band
we started talking on the msn and he said he wants to practice more and that guitardude sucks at guitar that we should replace him(i think he said this cause drummer used to be guitarist and he thinks he is the best guitarrist ever) and i told him if someone is pulling back the band was he cause he was the one that did want to practice more than one day at a week
also he is a kid(13) and he is kind of pretending his life is hard and nobody likes him
and he really thinks he needs to be more apreciated
i told him that we should stop complaining and just practice the times we can
the main problem we may have a small gig in 3 weeks

BTW replace is not an option for the next reasons

no decent drummers around here

we used to practice at his house
meeting someone in the internet is not safe at all in my city(trust me i know what i mean)

so any suggestions?
My Gear

Squier VM p-bass(i chosed it over a fender!!!) with quarter pounder and gotoh 201!!
fender MIM P bass
epiphone SG 400
#2
tell him all this stuff.
Epiphone Dot-335
Fender USA Tele
'82 30th anniversary Les Paul goldtop
1965 pre-CBS Fender Jaguar

Crybaby
TS-9
turbo rat
Ge-7
+many more

Fender Twin Reverb
King's Full-tube 100 watt half stack. - £300
#4
yep, and if that doesnt work, slap him about a bit, that should work
#5
tell him he is a good drummer, but you all think he being a bit of a dick and that he should show more respect cause ment to be mates. then make sure u tell him you all know he doesnt wana quit, obv cause he is keen, so let him know u need to just calm down a bit and have more fun with the band. lol im a keen drummer myself but i dont insult the other guys playing
#6
Quote by Hdap101
tell him all this stuff.

i did it
and he said
"you know what ,i quit the band"
EDIT i know tomorrow he will calm down
but what should i tell him?
My Gear

Squier VM p-bass(i chosed it over a fender!!!) with quarter pounder and gotoh 201!!
fender MIM P bass
epiphone SG 400
Last edited by litus at Mar 30, 2008,
#7
tell him ur sorry, but u meant whatcha meant, and if he wants what is best for the band, he will let you chill out and have fun cause you make the best music when your having fun
#8
today was a good day
he was just like nothing hapened and it was very cool so things are ok again
My Gear

Squier VM p-bass(i chosed it over a fender!!!) with quarter pounder and gotoh 201!!
fender MIM P bass
epiphone SG 400
#10
Quote by litus
today was a good day
he was just like nothing hapened and it was very cool so things are ok again

That generaly happens. It's just human nature. When one person decides to clear the air about band issues, there's always someone who takes offence, says something silly like 'I quit.' then once they've calmed down and thought about what's been said, feels embarrased, and would rather drop the entire subject.
This is a good thing though, as it's a sign that they have actualy taken in what you have to say and you should probably see a marked improvement in attitude from then on.

Musicians in general can be highly strung individuals, it comes with having an artistic nature and things are often said among a group of such people that is regretted afterwards. It's bound to happen occasionaly with even the most level headed people.
I've seen bands split over really stupidly trivial things, so it's maybe a good idea to have a kinda group philisophy like, 'Start each day afresh.' which means that whatever was said yesterday, doesn't matter today.
The bands that I know that have been around for years all kinda act in this way. Infact, I've noticed that it's a kinda unwritten rule or an understanding among many musicians that have been around the scene for 20 or so years. Where a young guy in his teens would react explosively, an older, more experienced musician would be more layed back about things, and there's a reason for that. His experience tells him that this is the best thing to do in this situation.
I used to roadie for a band that's still going strong after about 15 years and their members all fight like cats and dogs. The drummer was always having a go at the guitarists, the guitarist thought the bassist was lazy, who resented being called lazy and would retaliate, the singer was a prima-donna who thought he was a star and got a lot of flak from everybody else for it, ect, ect. They'd be arguing, almost punching each other, right up until going onstage, then pull off one of the most brilliant gigs you'd ever see, then walk off stage and relax for an hour or so and be completely different, all best mates, courtious to each other, the absolute opposite of what they were an hour and a half before hand. Then on the way home they'd gradualy start arguing again, and by the time we got back home, the gear would be packed away in an angry silence and you'd swear you'd just seen the beginning of the end for these guys, then next time they all meet up, it's as if nothing has happened. They may start arguing again at some point, but it's very rare that something that was said last time would be brought up.
Their bassist explained it to me once, he said 'It's just words, it's just how we let off steam and it's also a good way to get your adrenaline pumping before a gig. None of us actualy takes what anyone else says seriously, but it's nice to know that if someone calls you a ''bastard'', you can call them a ''sheep shagging arsewipe'' and get away with it.'
I used to play bass guitar in a band called Darkside. Me and the guitarist had been mates for years and we shared a strange sense of humour which involved constantly insulting each other as badly as we could. The guys in the band at first thought we were having a proper argument until we both fell about laughing, then the singer said, 'Y'know, we should all do that. Just imagine it, you can let all your frustrations out on each other, tell each other exactly what you really think of them, and no one will ever realise you were serious because it'll all just be taken as a joke.' So that's what we did, for 5 years. If anyone had a problem with someone else, he'd walk right up to him, grab him by the lapels of his jacket and say 'YOU ARE A C*NT!!!' then everyone would fall about laughing and it'd all be over and done with.
Eventualy the band fizzled apart with guys leaving to join other bands, but it was great while it lasted and we are still all best mates.

So remember guys, people argue. Especialy when you're all locked in a studio being creative, or locked in a van together travelling to gigs every day for hours on end. Take everything that's said with a pinch of salt, if someone says something nasty to you, get over it, don't take yourself or anyone else too seriously, and your band might just last long enough to make an impression.
Bands are like families and you should treat each band member like a family member. Sure, siblings argue and fall out occasionaly, but you wouldn't quit the family and refuse to have anything to do with your brother or your sister ever again if they said your playing sucked, so don't act like that with the rest of your band.
#11
Ahh! Wall of text! (gets crushed by giant wall of text)

If your drummer does that again, just slap him a bit.
#12
what's wrong with practicing more than 1 day a week? It sounds like he is more dedicated than you. I also think that you are assuming things if he thinks he is the best guitar player why would he think that and then be so self conscious about everything.

whatever, there's always 2 sides lol
Quote by TheCama
you are my bitches. all of you. don't fool yourself. i pwn.
#13
Quote by Koolcow
what's wrong with practicing more than 1 day a week? It sounds like he is more dedicated than you. I also think that you are assuming things if he thinks he is the best guitar player why would he think that and then be so self conscious about everything.

whatever, there's always 2 sides lol


I agree. I mean is there anything you would really rather do than hang out and play music with other ppl? I can't think of anything I would rather do. I would jump at the idea of having more jams/practices.
Quote by jackbauer
playing by yourself is like masturbating, sure it feels great, but it's nothing compared to the real deal.


Quote by guylee
Oh Shit! I Have A Weird Growth On My Body!

To The Pit!



JOIN MY GROUP plox

http://groups.ultimate-guitar.com/tonelife/
#14
It's hard to come across a good drummer. Most will think they're all that. Just talk to him about it and see if it helps. Tell him to quit kissing his own ass and get his **** together.
#15
most drummers are arrogant i.e me to a degree.
but you should tell him that once a week is all you need, and to just play his drums.
he shouldnt be saying **** about your other guitarist