#1
Alright, so I have a friend who plays guitar and isn't very good. He's in a 'hardcore/ metal/ alternative' band, and their band really isn't any good, even though they seem to believe they're 'the toast.'

Well, in their band, they have a bassist who started playing bass when he first joined the band, but who drives and has amazing gear. They have a guitarist/vocalist who's a prick, and is dating their drummer's ex-girlfriend. They have a phenomenal drummer. He came in 3rd place for our state percussionist competition or something.

I was looking to start a band for the talent show, because I thought it'd be neat to play. Drummers are scarce in my town, so I asked my fellow guitarist friend if he knew any.

"I only know a few good ones," he says. "Ours, and this guy named Buddha." (yeah, I know...)

So, I say "Well, if Buddha can't, can I borrow Danny?" and my friend tells me if I do, he'll be pissed.

I ask Buddha the next day, and he says he's really busy. So, when my guitarist friend John is playing a show that afternoon, I take the opportunity to ask Danny if he thinks he'd like to play in a temporary band with me.

He tells me that their band's gonna break up soon, and that the guys in it can't play well, and that there's too much drama, and how he'd rather be in a band with me, because 'I'm on his level. He also mentioned how he's tired of the whole 'hardcore' scene and that he'd rather play music that takes talent and all that.

Of course, I'm flattered, but I'm also concerned of the type of friction this may cause between John and I.
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#2
and sally slept with john? what?

what do you want us to say. just tell john to F off.
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#3
John sounds like a dick, and he'll get over it eventually.
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#5
don't be friends with bad people

not just people who are bad at guitar, people who are bad at life
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#7
Just get the drummer to leave the band that's 'breaking up anyway,' leave it for a few weeks, then form a band with him.
It's like personal relationships, it's not a good thing to go out with someone while they're going out with someone else, but when those two arn't attached anymore, and everybody are free agents again, then nobody else has the right to say a damn thing when you get together.
#8
That does make a lot of sense. I'm just worried how to confront John about this. He's kinda sensitive.


P.S. John was not dating the drummer's ex, it was a different guy in the band, fyi.
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#10
And now get yourself a killer bassman and you have the groove machine.

But honestly, it seemed to me like your friend acted as if the drummer was his own belonging o_o
As long as it's just a temporary band project it shouldn't have been a problem at all...well I certainly wouldn't have any probs as long as my band doesn't get slowed down.
#11
yeah, just the drummer is about to quit the old band. My plan is to have the drummer and I writing material and practicing in sercret for a few weeks until John simmers down. Will that work?
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#12
Or, you could man up and be honest about everything. Yes, it's likely to cause more short term friction, but it's best* never, ever, ever to lie if you can possibly avoid it and it doesn't look like anyone is going to die if you tell the truth, so out with it.

*for a dizzying variety of moral, practical, selfish and selfless reasons.
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#13
Quote by Jix_Jax
yeah, just the drummer is about to quit the old band. My plan is to have the drummer and I writing material and practicing in sercret for a few weeks until John simmers down. Will that work?

I should think so, once things have calmed down, (give it about a month and a half) announce to all and sundry that you and the drummer are starting a 'project' together 'while you both have nothing else to do' ( ) then over time the project gradualy becomes 'the band.' By which time John should have moved on with his life.
#14
Okay, I like Slacker's idea, sorry Damascus.

I need to say though, when the drummer leaves (for he is 3/4 of the bands talent, honestly) the band will most certainly implode. Then, a month and a half later, my bandless friend John will go on the rampage, either being pissed at me, or looking to hop onto the project with the drummer and I.

Him hopping on would be bad, because a.) John isn't at all decent at guitar in any aspects, b.) he's arrogant, c.) he refuses to practice because of 'b.)', d.) he picks fights with bandmates, and e.) he doesn't have any functioning gear, except a half dead Mashall MG! [shudders]...

help?
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#15
i say you should just get rid of john as a friend all together.

because a.) John isn't at all decent at guitar in any aspects, b.) he's arrogant, c.) he refuses to practice because of 'b.)', d.) he picks fights with bandmates, and e.) he doesn't have any functioning gear, except a half dead Mashall MG! [shudders].
#16
Quote by Jix_Jax
Okay, I like Slacker's idea, sorry Damascus.

I need to say though, when the drummer leaves (for he is 3/4 of the bands talent, honestly) the band will most certainly implode. Then, a month and a half later, my bandless friend John will go on the rampage, either being pissed at me, or looking to hop onto the project with the drummer and I.

Him hopping on would be bad, because a.) John isn't at all decent at guitar in any aspects, b.) he's arrogant, c.) he refuses to practice because of 'b.)', d.) he picks fights with bandmates, and e.) he doesn't have any functioning gear, except a half dead Mashall MG! [shudders]...

help?

Look, at some point, you are just gonna have to stand up to this guy and say 'No!' otherwise you're gonna be his patsy for a loooooooooong time.
Seriously, you can't have guys in the band that are only there because they've bullied their way into the band.
I had almost the exact same situation years ago, when I was still just a kid really, with a band I was in. The singer was a proper bully who got all his own way by throwing his weight about. Eventualy the rest of us decided this could not continue, but it was his band so we couldn't exactly fire him either, so we all left the band and formed a new one without him (called the Three Amigos, which eventualy became Slack Babbath)
When the guy found out, he was livid. He came straight to my house (because I was the smallest, skinniest guy in the band) and hammered on my door. This was first thing on a Sunday morning and I just had a pair of pajama pants on, but he was stood there in a full set of padded motorcycle leathers, steel toe capped boots, gauntlets, and a helmet. He may as well have been wearing a suit of armour.... Anyway, he told me he wanted me to step outside so he could 'kick the sh!t out of me' and that's when I realised that he was a coward, he wouldn't be confronting me dressed in all this protective gear otherwise.
So I grabbed a large breadknife (we were stood at my kitchen door) and walked outside, he saw the knife and said 'Whaddaya think your doing?' So I smiled and said 'Well if you're gonna wear a suit of armour, I'll have a sword, unless you wanna strip down until you're wearing the same as me, and then I'm gonna really, really hurt you.'
He called me 'mental' and shouted a few other terms of abuse as he walked away, but that's the point, he walked away. He was a typical bully who had come to my house with the intention of scaring me, and when it didn't work and I stood up to him he backed down, very quickly.
Now I'm not suggesting you confront the guy with a breadknife like I did with my bully, that was a pretty stupid thing for me to do, but it's like this, there are two of you, the drummer and yourself, and only one of him. If neither of you want him in the band, and if he pushes the point that he wants in, stand together and just tell him 'no,' stand up to him. Believe me, he'll walk away. It may be an ugly scene, confrontation often is, but he will walk away and it'll be a damn sight better than having to put up with him.
This has got a little confusing but am I right in thinking that both yourself and John are guitarists? If so, just tell him 'sorry, but we've already got a guitarist.'
If he turns really nasty, get a restraining order on him.
Last edited by SlackerBabbath at Apr 6, 2008,
#17
Quote by SlackerBabbath
Look, at some point, you are just gonna have to stand up to this guy and say 'No!' otherwise you're gonna be his patsy for a loooooooooong time.
Seriously, you can't have guys in the band that are only there because they've bullied their way into the band.
I had almost the exact same situation years ago, when I was still just a kid really, with a band I was in. The singer was a proper bully who got all his own way by throwing his weight about. Eventualy the rest of us decided this could not continue, but it was his band so we couldn't exactly fire him either, so we all left the band and formed a new one without him (called the Three Amigos, which eventualy became Slack Babbath)
When the guy found out, he was livid. he came straight to my house (because I was the smallest, skinniest guy in the band) and hammered on my door. This was first thing on a Sunday morning and I just had a pair of pajama pants on, but he was stood there in a full set of padded motorcycle leathers, steel toe capped boots, gauntlets, and a helmet. He may as well have been wearing a suit of armour.... Anyway, he told me he wanted me to step outside so he could 'kick the sh!t out of me' and that's when I realised that he was a coward, he wouldn't be confronting me dressed in all this protective gear otherwise.
So I grabbed a large breadknife (we were stood at my kitchen door) and walked outside, he saw the knife and said 'Whaddaya think your doing?' So I smiled and said 'Well if you're gonna wear a suit of armour, I'll have a sword, unless you wanna strip down until you're wearing the same as me, and then I'm gonna really, really hurt you.'
He called me 'mental' and shouted a few other terms of abuse as he walked away, but that's the point, he walked away. He was a typical bully who had come to my house with the intention of scaring me, and when it didn't work and I stood up to him he backed down, very quickly.

As I said before, do you ever stop being excellent?
#18
I do have to say, Slacker, you are a genius. Correct, we are both guitarists. I guess that is the best way to do it. Me and the drummer talked it over and came to the conclusion that he aint gettin into that band with us, no way, no how, no sir.

Slacker Saves the Day!
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#19
Quote by Retro Rocker
As I said before, do you ever stop being excellent?


Quote by Jix_Jax
I do have to say, Slacker, you are a genius. Correct, we are both guitarists. I guess that is the best way to do it. Me and the drummer talked it over and came to the conclusion that he aint gettin into that band with us, no way, no how, no sir.

Slacker Saves the Day!

Aww guys, stop it, you're making me blush.
But cheers anyhow.

Glad I could help Jix_Jax, good luck with the new band.
Last edited by SlackerBabbath at Apr 6, 2008,
#21
Get the drummer to try to break up his crap band. Then, a bit after that, you guys can make a band. And, BTW, is the bassist any good? 'Cause he sounds like he'd be good to have...if he's good and not a prick too.